I'm into things outdoors. Love to ski. Have a sweet beach cruiser I enjoy riding. Used to hike and camp a lot. Worked for a few summers as a white water raft guide in Maine. Love to fish out of my kayak. I play on an old man hockey team with buddies from high school.
In the summers I work as first mate on a fishing charter out of Beverly. Wish it could pay the bills full time. I'm saving my pennies for a SUP.
I'm certified as a Crossfit trainer and until fatherhood, worked out 5x a week. These days I try to at least run as often as possible.
I'm comfortable at a neighborhood bar, at a museum, or just about anything in between. I brew my own beer, keep honeybees, can run a chainsaw and a front end loader...but also go for regular facials and pedicures, love to go shopping, and appreciate ladies who wear hot shoes.
I'm wry, smart, socially adaptable, thoughtful, usually well-dressed, snarky, in love with learning anything new, sarcastic, up for whatever. I do not hide my emotions well. I do not like to lose. I cannot make eye contact with a person I don't respect. Sometimes I'm too abrupt.
You: funny, intelligent, confident, fit, able to make decisions, someone who keeps promises and plans, assertive without being rude, willing to please, at your most beautiful first thing in the morning with no makeup. Like it or not, I'm going to share exactly what's on my mind; you should welcome and appreciate the candor. And know what candor means and that this is a sentence fragment.
Turn ons: candle lit dinners, long walks on the beach, platform peep toes, brains, cropped yoga pants, obnoxious laughs, musky perfume, painted nails, loose ponytails, those dimples right above your bum, jeans that fit right, coy smiles, actually listening during conversation.
Turn offs: mean people, war, warm beer, scrunchies, mom jeans, not laughing at my jokes, super thick Mass accents, running shoes as casual footwear, people who love themselves too much, sweatpants in public, dating website profile pictures that give away too much personal information, pink sox or pats gear, twofacedness, drama for drama's sake, indecision
Tattoos are awesome-the bigger, the better-but not on your face, please.
Do you also believe that girls don't poop? Can you fold a fitted sheet? (I cannot) Will you always buy me beer when you grocery shop? Do you know what the Oxford comma is? We may be a perfect match...
I know I'm exhausting and seem high maintenance, but I'm not, and if you take good care of me, I'll take really good care of you.
Conversation Starters (i.e. what you'd like to do on a first date...)
You drink till I'm good looking, then buy me a Maserati and lie to me about how hot my body is.
Sit on the wall at Rye beach philosophizing and watching the surfers while the sun sets behind us.
Sneak into the local country club's tennis courts and challenge any takers to a doubles match.
Set out to find the world's best nachos and coldest beer.
Take a tour of the Teddy peanut butter factory, a tour of the Smuckers jelly plant, a tour of the Wonder bread baking facility, then have chicken salad on rye for lunch.