BigUglyJohn: talk nerdy to me...
Non-Smoker with Athletic body type
Homewood, Alabama
47 year old Male, 6' 4" (193cm), Non-religious
Caucasian, Leo
BigUglyJohn isn't seeking a relationship or any kind of commitment.
Bachelors Degree

I am Seeking a Woman For Friends
Needs Test Not Completed Chemistry View his chemistry results
Do you drink? Socially Do you want children? Undecided/Open
Marital Status Divorced Do you do drugs? No
Hair Color Brown Eye Color Grey
Do you have a car? Yes Do you have children? Yes
Longest Relationship Over 7 years
Pets No Pets  

About Me
chat with me!!! im bored! ha

warning: i am intelligent but i never capitalize...sorry. haha

i have really been thru it the last few years...i just cant understand why it's so hard to find faithful, loyal, and honest in a cute package. is it really that hard to be those things???
i want first and foremost someone who is honest and dependable and loyal...who always follows thru on promises and never breaks their word...someone who is family oriented and puts family ahead of career and everything else...someone to go places and do things with who will dote on me and show me attn and love-you have no idea how much youll get back if you do!...who will think im pretty cool and be proud of me...who will wear earrings bc i bought them as a gift even if you dont like em so much...someone to hang out with and be my best friend. i realize this is what everyone says they want, but in my experience what people say and what they do is often two entirely different things. i also enjoy simple things and would love to meet someone who does as well. like yard sales and used book stores. i enjoy kayaking and camp fires. i put family ahead of career. i have dreams, but they are on hold until the time is right. i think my main focus now should be my kids and raising them to be respectful, famiy-oriented people. i have no desire to move them or to move away from them. i actually LOVE being around them. they make me laugh...theyre always there for me, they have never let me down. i feel the same way about my parents. we are all very close. but i am ready to let someone else and their family in if it's right. but i am not rushing anything.

ok; on to the funny stuff:

it is beyond me how a woman can post pictures of her kids and her boobs at the same time, does anyone think about things before they do them???

i also question the judgement of people who post pictures of their children on here...especially with their names!

i have a weakness for nerdy, quirky women in not much make-up and glasses
i also dont mind if youre over weight, just be honest. i could stand to lose a few myself. keep this in mind as you read on...just be honest.

here are a few things that, if seen in your profile, will get you ignored...

2. pouty-pics...
3. too much cleavage showin intentionally
4. ANY two fingered hand sign flashin...especially with your tongue stuck out gene simmonsesque or pouty lipped (see#2 above)
5. misuse of words/bad grammar...i can't spell a lick but i know which word i'm goin for!!! ie: there/they're/their, to/too/two, your/you're, using the word "myself" incorrectly in a feeble attempt to sound more intelligent...also, just so you know, if you're adding "-ing" to a word you should drop the "E"- such as in "loving" and "caring" (loveing??? really????)
6. "cute" captions with your pics...that just cheesy...but if YOU'RE gonna do it, do it right..
it's not "soandso and I"'s soandso and ME!!! would you just put "i" under a picture??? i think not
7. glamour shots...for the love of all thats holy; and why are they all pullin on a hat or tuggin up a collar of a pleather jacket???
8. pics of pics/bathroom mirror pics...yeah, the first place i want to see you is in the room you crap in
9. "long walks on the beach" "curled up on the couch" "whether it be in heels and a black dress or jeans and a tee" "not afraid to get dirty" "i work hard and play hard"...these are in every profile
10. if you're lookin up in all your pics, we know you're hidin a double chin...its true
11. just so you know...if you're large enough to be a lineman that doesnt make you athletic...
12. think of "a few" in "a few extra pounds in monetary 50 or even 20 a few dollars??? if someone said, "loan me a few bucks for lunch" are you shellin out 10s and 20s??? nope
13. if you are not only over weight, but you make up for it by smokin...nice
14. the number of children you have is usually inversely proportionate to the number of pictures of dogs you have in your profile...
15. "smokes occasionally"??? really??? thats a yes or no do or you dont. "i smoke when i drink"-you smoke
16. "i have one" "working" "good job" as an answer for profession screams "wal-mart greeter"\
17. "prefer not to say" assumes the worst...assumes worse than the worst actually
18. the whole "white shirt/khaki shorts" combo on the beach...yeah, thats not over done at all
19. if the word "sassy" appears anywhere in your profile...especially as a caption for a picture, which brings me to the next:
20. if EVERY ONE of your pictures is captioned with something that tries to be cute like "caught you lookin"
21. "i am still great friends with my ex"'s a divorce. move on. if this works for you then great...i know from experience it doesnt work for me to date a woman who is friends with an ex. an ex anything as a matter of fact: husband, boyfriend, fwb. it doesnt work...and on a related note, if you dated a cop at one time or another, this spells trouble. i know this from experience as well...

so, onto my favorite subject: me! haha
things about me that you should know:
1. the most important thing in the world to me is family...if you dont have people you can depend on, what do you really have? i am not career oriented at all. i have my treasure in other places. i have the two best kids in the world and i work a crummy night job just so i can see them every day. i pick them up from school and keep them until about 6 or so. i have them every other weekend too. i think too many dads write a check and are content to be a dad 4 days a month. i am with my kids because i need them as much as they need me. we are very close and i am also close to my parents whom i respect more than any two people i know. if you can tell alot about a man by the way he treats his mom, go home with me will probably be enough.

2. i have no pets but there are two lesbians who live behind me that i feed from time to time.

3. i love to cook...i think a great sunday is findin a cool new recipe in the bookstore and goin to the grocery store to buy the stuff together and cooking and laughing with lots of music and a little beer...

4. i love my arm held in the grocery store...

5. i think that facebook can potentially ruin a relationship and im not too keen on tons of guy friends and guys writing crap on your just just sayin. i took my facebook down, as a matter-of-fact. i am a grown-ass man and i dont really need that drama.

6. i usually go for younger women, at times much younger. maybe thats my problem but it seems to suit me. i am active and young at heart. i seem to attract younger women too...i guess guys under 30 are boys. i think i am gonna break this one though. i am starting no