candid_1: there once was a man from Nantucket...
Non-Smoker with Athletic body type
Bf nowhere, Ontario
54 year old Female, 5' 9" (175cm), Non-religious
Caucasian, Cancer
candid_1 isn't seeking a relationship or any kind of commitment.
Associates Degree
shiit disturber

Oct/08... Say moose & squirrel.

I am Seeking a Man For Friends
Needs Test View her relationship needs Chemistry View her chemistry results
Do you drink? Socially Do you want children? Does not want children
Marital Status Married Do you do drugs? No
Hair Color Red Eye Color Other
Do you have a car? Yes Do you have children? Yes
Longest Relationship Over 7 years
Pets No Pets  

About Me
******* 2010 Pond closed for maintenance. Here for the forums and friends - I found my evil twin and am out of the fish market******* AUGUST 2011 - MARRIED THE EVIL TWIN AND YUP - FOUND HIM HERE IN THIS MURKY POND*********This is the profile that got me committed (read as you will)****

I'm sane (well, not medicated), attractive, and have my own teeth. Past the sell by date for good breeding stock, but still hot. I'm literate - can curse fluently; I help little old ladies cross the street (they don't want to go, but I make 'em - look a penny!), and am a nice person (right)...

Looking for a quality guy. You don't need to be rich or Brad Pitt, but a little eye-candy goes a long way... Must be able to spell IQ or a reasonable facsimile... Somewhere around my age (give or take 10 years)... be able to walk a flight of steps without oxygen and fit into a movie seat. You don't need to be buff (that would make me look flabby) but I am looking for something between a pet rock and marathoner.

Would prefer a non-smoker as it's a filthy disgusting habit; I should have listened to mom and taken up heroin. I function best around non-smokers or those with oxygen tanks - they make me behave, but when can I truly, if ever, consider myself a non-smoker? As long as you don't smoke and/or we don't have sex - I should be fine...

I'm self-employed, self-sufficient, and am comfortable in my own skin. I will never ask if something makes me look fat and I flat out refuse to cling or whine, but I do like feedback whether physical or verbal. I'm looking for that special someone to share life - it just doesn't need to be in the same sandbox (failed sandbox 101). If you insist on the same sandbox, I reserve the right to take my toys and go home... oh, that's your ball?

Optimistically online best describes me. I know that there are some wonderful people out there; the trick is to find them. If you're looking penpals - fine. For any other kind of relationship realize ultimately YOU HAVE TO BE WILLING TO MEET, but I'm not necessarily referring to me... I'm like nailing jello to the wall, but take a chance and put yourself out there. Remember, no guts - no glory and you're here for a reason. If you send a message and I don't respond, blame it on the green dot. Electronic tracking chafes - I'm hidden for the most part, honest, and true. If I tell you I'm here for the forums, believe me...

A funny thing happened on the way to the forums... LMAO - gotta stay outta the forums... will know better for future. Okay, so I love the forums... just don't judge me by the posts. I am explicit and candidly share my point of view. The forums are my release. If you want to know me better, you can find my thoughts and rants here:

-----> Another thing - I adore men, but if you whine, b!tch, or moan (out of context) - no soup for you!

2010 - More disclaimers - TIRED OF THE BUFFET... Here for the entertainment and door prizes... I really want the toaster.

STUPID QUESTIONS: Regarding the longest relationship question - I answered truthfully... I was with my dog for 7 yrs... I forgot about the cat - he lasted 13... the hubby less than 2 - he wasn't nice to the dog, so one of them had to go.

SINGLE, BUT NOT NECESSARILY INTERESTED... LOL - who cares about apathy? Friends are always welcome. --->More rants - if you are viewing me because I viewed you, please don't read more into it than that. A nod's as good as a wink to a blind man... I also like to read the obits...

I get a kick out of guys who look for "fun" and "adventurous" women... trust me, I'm so not... my idea of adventure is eating leftovers at the 3 day mark and "roughing it" is a weekend without makeup... still I can be amusing company. Those who know me enjoy my mind... or is it the trick pelvis? Hmmm.... toodles off to ponder... I won't try to sell you on what a nice person I am. Those who like me like me a lot.

Many people - okay men, ask me about the boots and the shoes... some people post cats, dogs, fish, and vacation shots. I just happen to like shoes better than bass...

2010 ponderings, rants, and musings:
- If women have an easier time online, why am I sitting at home?
- To me, the most attractive feature a man can have is intelligence... I love a wickedly quick mind.
- I get paroled every 2nd weekend for bad behavior, so cancelling last minute is the kiss of death... nobody leaves Baby in a corner.
- Ice wine is yummy...
- Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies... If you really don't want to know, don't ask.
- If I view you more than once, don't take it personally... I have the memory of a goldfish - oh look, a rock!
- Confidence is the sexiest thing a man can wear...
- Phuck buddies are fine, but I'm looking for someone I can drag out in public...
- and it's one thing to dine on crumbs, it's another to exist on vapours. I need more than casual, but don't start picking china patterns.
- I'd say I like walks on the beach, but I'd probably drive there...

Conversation Starters (i.e. what you'd like to do on a first date...)
What I would do on a first date... definitely not sky diving... would need to be really really really drunk or pushed to get me out of a perfectly good plane. Also, ix nay on the rollercoasters, bungee jumping, or other daredevil dates. I hate first dates... just call it the interview and bring references. I'll bring the psyche assessment and circle the crazy days on a calendar for you (see? I am nice)...

Seriously, I'm not fussy and I like to eat/drink on a semi-regular basis. A first meet should be a no obligation, no money down kind of lookee/see. That way if we both go EWWWWhhhh - no harm, no foul (and enough with the freakin' chicken... foul as in baseball). Tea? Scotch? It's 9 a.m??? oops - 'kay, I'll behave.

One more first date rant: You know how warning labels are put on products, because some doofus did a really stupid thing with it - like stick their fingers in the garberator with power on or blow dry their hair with a heat & strip gun? At the risk of being crass with those who are not doofusses (plural doofi?)... first meet - if you want to show me your "endowment" on the basis of a 45 minute chat, it better be a hospital or university wing...and no, I won't pat it.

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