Tumbling gently into Fall...
About me: I like to bicycle (I try to do 6 miles a day), walk in the parks and be outside when weather permits. I enjoy coffee shops and restaurants. Thai, Vietnamese, Chinese, and Greek cuisine are my favorites.
Grilling or cooking up something simple but interesting to go with a nice bottle of wine and then watching a film or just hanging on the patio is always a pleasure.
Love being on the water in the summertime. I sailed a lot until a bi-lateral knee replacement. With luck, I hope to sail again this year.````
I grew up in Chicago, Boston and New York. A gentle soul, I've worked in higher education and have been an actor, translator, freelance writer, editor and regional director of communications and development for a non-profit human relations organization.
I lived and worked in France and so, Saturdays, I go downtown to a café and speak French with a group of 40 or so delightful folks who share that passion. We talk about everything. I never know what will happen there and, frankly, I like that.
Friends describe me as reliable, open and trustworthy. Sometimes I can make them laugh uproariously.
My religion is loving kindness and I make the effort to practice it every day.
There is no need for temples;
no need for complicated philosophy.
Our own brain, our own heart is our temple;
the philosophy is kindness.
---The Dalai Lama
And, yes, some days it ain't easy, but I just keep working at it. "Your beliefs don't make you a better person, your behavior does."
A lot of my inspiration comes from the ancients: “Live a good life. If there are gods and they are just, then they will not care how devout you have been, but will welcome you based on the virtues you have lived by. If there are gods, but unjust, then you should not want to worship them. If there are no gods, then you will be gone, but will have lived a noble life that will live on in the memories of your loved ones.”
--- Marcus Aurelius
An earnest questioner, I know that I can never know all the answers. I’m glad Studs Terkel (whom I met years ago in Chicago) told me his secret was to “shut up, listen, and try to figure out what’s going on.”
I rescued Guido and Luigi, two Norwegian Forest cats, and lived with them for 20 years. Now I live with a blended family of 4 rescues (Munchkin, Fuzzy, Gizmo [a.k.a.Groucho], and Nano). They've taught me a lot about how to think like a cat. =^..^=
If you're not into animals, you should probably stop here: the pride is family.
The best things are always unexpected and I recognize what I'm looking for when I see it.
Learning new things is always a rewarding challenge.
I quit smoking 25 years ago and find the smell of cigarette smoke really disagreeable,
Bottom line: A what-you-see-is-what-you-get, no drama kind of guy. Manners, courtesy, consideration for others, civility... You remember all that, right? It's just how my parents brought me up. If you get that, I'm really easy to get along with.
Today's fortune cookie: "You find beauty in ordinary things. Do not lose this ability." Wabi-Sabi!
Ran across the following on The Writer's Almanac's celebration of Arthur Conan Doyle's birthday: And Sherlock Holmes said to his sidekick, Dr. Watson, "You have a grand gift for silence, Watson. It makes you quite invaluable as a companion."
And I realized that my taste for silence is indeed a gift...
You can't meaningfully be with someone else until you are comfortable being alone.
Who are you?
You know Maureen Dowd was right when she said: "The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for."
That's why you would rather go for a walk in the cold rain than to a dull party.
Other than that, I look forward to the great adventure of discovering who you are.
Cher once said, "If grass can grow through concrete, love can find you at every time in your life.” I believe that one day someone will walk into my life and I will understand why it never worked out with anyone else.
"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them."
---Thomas Merton, No Man Is an Island
"The older you get, the more you know what you like to do with your time. And who you like to do it with." (Ernestine Anderson at age 70, singing with the Concorde Jazz All-Stars) And the more you know who you really are, as well.
"Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?"
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them; the first time." ---Maya Angelou
I hope you're out there somewhere...
About the INTENT indication above: Let's start things simply and see what happens in the present without heaping on expectations about what may or may not happen later. Taking things to the next level is always a mutual decision at the appropriate moment.
P.S. Fragile human beings that we are, and soul-crushing experience that on-line dating can be, why don't we try this as a solution to the "mutual interest" question:
If I've added you as a favorite or sent you a message, that's definitely a sign of my interest.
If you remove yourself from my favorite's list, delete a message I send you, or allow my message to you to be automatically erased after 20 days, I'll get the hint and move on. No harm, no foul. As Chief Dan George said so beautifully, "Sometimes the magic works. Sometimes, it doesn't." Silence has its own eloquence and life is what it is. Based on experience, that seems to be how things are done here. As they say in court, Res ipsa loquitur.
Of course, these protocols may be assumed to apply reciprocally.
I don't have the upgrade, so messaging me is the only working form of contact here.
"All behavior is communication." ---Gregory Bateson
“When people show you who they are, believe them.” ---Dr. Maya Angelou
Life can be amazingly easy. The truth is always right in front of us, if we just open our eyes....
“Don’t make up reasons why you can’t go out with a guy you don’t want to go out with. You don’t owe anyone an explanation. A simple ‘No thanks’ should be acceptable.” ---A Mother's advice to her five year-old daughter.
Yes, this profile is long, it's true. But I listen equally well.
The best gift you could ever give someone is your time because you're giving them something you'll never get back.
One last note: if you like Donald Trump, you won't like me.
Conversation Starters (i.e. what you'd like to do on a first date...)
A first meeting is always preliminary to a first date. Let's do lunch or coffee early in the day in a quiet, relaxed, public environment. Or we could find an amusing Happy Hour where it's quiet enough to talk.
Walks or bike rides are fun, too, as are art museums and galleries or any other place where there are lots of things to talk about.
Have a well-behaved dog? Super! Let’s go for a walk and then to the dog park!
Or we could do something else..
I can't guarantee that I'm the person you're looking for, but I can guarantee that you will not regret having decided to take the trouble to meet me.
What more could I offer?
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