I’m just going to go ahead and give the short version of how I ended up in Alabama and why I am wanting to return from whence I came...
I suffer from poor choices. If you feel like you must continue reading...
Greetings, fishermen or catfishers, whatever your intent is here.
Sheesh, what to put in this section. Certainly nothing negative..clever, charming, intelligent, what more can I say? Oh yeah, a great sense of humor too! Please display some of these characteristics yourself! Education and intelligence, please! I am huge on proper grammar, spelling and punctuation, so yes, I will most likely correct you.
I have 3 kids, one is out of the house and in the military. I do have 2 at home yet, and I will not be having any more. So, if you want kids, I am not the person for you.
I enjoy walks, (note, peaceful walks), but usually just end up chasing the kids around. Like dogs, they don't seem to understand the "Come" command either. Secretly, I think they understand it all too well and just pretend not to get it. So, if you're ever out and about and see a 2 kidded streak race past and some equally crazed person chasing them, it's probably me.
I like camping. There is something about spending time outdoors scratching bug bites, traipsing through the bushes and numerous poisonous, itchy plants and smelling like Bug Off that I find appealing. Perhaps it's because I don't have to do my hair, put on make up or shave my legs. Nah, I think it's the Bug Off.
I enjoy going out because I like music and dancing. Don't get the wrong impression here. I don't play any musical instruments and am not a very good dancer. In fact, I'll probably just end up stomping all over your toes, so you may want to consider a good pair of steel toed dress shoes and a hard hat, just in case. Maybe not the greatest fashion accessories, but remember, safety first!
I’m not interested in seeing your nudes at all. If you want to send me pics, send some of your medicine cabinet so I can see what level of crazy I may be dealing with.
Here are some tips before you message me:
Right now, I'm just looking to make a few friends since I don't really know anyone here. I’m waiting for the call from Lifetime for movie rights for what got me to Alabama. Maybe I’m joking, maybe not. If you're looking to get married next week, nope.
If you have kids, great. If you want more kids, I'm not the person for you. I already have 3 and my uterus is not a clown car.
If you have any sort of criminal record, please do not contact me! I will find out.. ;)
People, please do not put pics of your kids on these sites! You never know who is lurking!
I am not interested in one night stands. If that's what you're in to, go get a blow up doll.
If you are taking medications to make you a bit less crazy, please pass me up. I’ve had enough crazy to last me a lifetime. Trust me.
If you are a catfish, trust me, I am the WRONG one to target. ;)
If you want a halfway decent chance at a reply from me, make sure your message has substance and not just a generic, "Sup?" or something equally as irritating. In reality, I think you are wanting to suggest a good soup to enjoy. Also, if you are the type of person that freaks out when you don't get a reply, or feels the need to message me an additional 100 times, it just tells me you're desperate or messaging every woman on here. If I don't answer you, I'm sorry, I'm not interested. Sometimes life isn't always fair, my friends. I used to send "Thanks, but no thanks" replies, but thanks to a select crowd, I no longer do it. Good luck in your searches.
I am most likely going back home, SOON, so at this point, I’m not looking for anything long term. Just some friends so I’m not so lonely. Maybe someone can change my mind, but I highly doubt it.