New image posted August 20, 2017 from last night
If your status is non-religious that is a deal breaker for me. Please note my status is Christian other. If you contact me I will not reply.
****WARNING DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE HUMOR CHALLENGED OR IMPAIRED*****
1. My sense of humor is very much an acquired taste. May take heavy meds to acquire that taste, but hey…not my problem now is it? (I’d suggest a good prescription plan)
2. Sometimes I laugh when noone else is and don’t when everyone else is. (Yes, weddings, funerals…graduation…ehh)
3. At times I’ll make a half hearted attempt at figuring myself out. After a few reflective moments, I’ll flip on the TV. If you can’t, then don’t ask me for any help.
4. I don’t leave messages on answering machines. When I hear the beep…my palms sweat. Yeah…see above…don’t ask.
5. If you think I’m quirky about answering machines, whip out a camera. Again refer to above.
6. I eat things with a knife and fork that most eat with their hands.
7. I ask for things “on the side”. Cue “When Harry Met Sally”.
8. I don’t lose things, I just occasionally misplace them. Keys and sunglasses…, I have duplicates of both. Enough sunglasses if I were strapped for cash, I could set up a kiosk in the mall.
9. I make shopping lists (ehh…shopping…blek…I hate it) and leave them at home. For the psychologists, I know blah blah it’s subliminal.
10, My friends have told me I could have a conversation with a mailbox. If I had a pet rock, I’m sure we’d have some very meaningful convos. Conversation is like ping pong…if it’s not coming back, I’ll set my paddle down and go home.
11. I’m apparently a lot of fun at parties, whether invited or not (yeah did a few crashes). No lampshades have ever been used or damaged. I never leave any contact info when I’ve crashed…Owen Wilson should have taken a few notes…and Vince. You crash and leave. Ehh, it’s just a movie…such amateurs.
12. I’m soft hearted and firm minded. The soft hearted…has to be the right place at the right time. Firm minded…stubborn…yeah…inflexible…perhaps. Try to change my mind…may as well try to spin the earth backwards.
13. As an addendum to the above, I have changed my mind, thoughts, and POV. I’m not closed off to it, but it has to come from me. It’s my prerogative….(is someone cuing up Bobby Brown?) I am very much live and let live so I allow anyone and everyone that. Don’t try to do it for me, and I won’t do it for you. Then we can go get ice cream!!
14. I don’t always use my turn signal. Good driver, always had the discounts. But if there’s no cars around. I’m such a rebel…haha. This makes one of my daughters bonkers…of course I paid to send her to a good driving school. She always uses her turn signal. (wiping tears…) I’m so proud.
15. I am my own fashion statement. It may be “duh”. I don’t care…I will save the Groucho glasses/mustache (good ones!!_) and won’t show up for a casual first meet at…well wherever…Village Inn…Dennys..(yeah I don’t get out much) in my leopard skin catsuit and black miniskirt….or my sequined butterfly top. I’m usually dressed and groomed like the person you’d have an appointment with to get loan at the bank.
16. I’m social and mingling is second nature and not to be concerned, at the same time you never know. I would never accompany someone to a social/work function and end up on your bosses’ lap…AKK.
17. My tastes are well just what they are. I like many things that not many people do, and things that a lot of people like I don’t. (I’m just writing this, not going to explain….haha).
18. I don’t care to be asked what I’m thinking. If you do that, then I can’t think because I have to stop and answer. (It makes sense to me!!)
19. I don’t like big crowds. Unless they were standing in line to give me money, Since that hasn’t happened…yet…ehh.
20. I am as direct and upfront as I can be while being tactful as possible. Don’t ask me something you don’t want an honest answer to (unless it’s about your mother..haha).
Conversation Starters (i.e. what you'd like to do on a first date...)
If you think I'm the woman of your dreams....lay off the Lunesta!!