Hello! Thanks for looking at my profile. Being that we’re all here for online people shopping, I figured I’d keep this short and to the point.
Hobbies: wandering America in search of the hot dogs of my childhood, saving the world from the onslaught of hipsters while trying not to become one (note: this is only a problem around the full moon), studying pirate history, seeing the 100+ Marvel and DC movies that come out every year, hanging with my dogs (my actual dogs—I have two boxers), making cool sh*t (I’m a tinkerer), riding my motorcycle too damn fast, reading Douglas Adams and Stephen King and Hunter S. Thompson
Goals and aspirations: a simple, happy life free from the evils of the calendar. I look at the world as one giant, sardonic adventure and would like to keep it that way.
More information about myself: I don’t really like talking about myself and would rather have conversations about other things, but just so you know what you’re in for: I’m a laid back guy with a weird sense of humor (you probably already realized that.) I like old blues, old country, and classic rock, and wouldn’t mind going to a concert or two. When I’m at home, I mostly hang out in jeans and a t-shirt (I’ve been told I clean up well but mostly see ties as tools of unnecessary strangulation) and I consider binge-watching Netflix and making a pizza an acceptable day. I also like going fishing, seeing a comedy show, or taking a weekend to take off on my motorcycle in somewhat random directions (guests welcome!)
For relationship history, I’ve been married twice; the first time it was for 20 years and I raised four kids, and the second time was for 6 years and I raised two dogs. I don’t mind if you have kids (being a dad/granddad is one of the best parts of my life!) but I don’t personally see myself having any more of my own.
What I’m looking for: More than anything, I’m looking for someone real. I know online dating wants you to look fun and exciting and into hiking and karaoke, but I’d rather spend time with someone who is passionate about what they actually do. If you like to spend your time cliff diving or hanging out in Spongebob pajamas all day and knitting, either is fine with me. (If you like working on old cars, though, I will say that there’s nothing sexier to me than a gal in ripped jeans and covered in grease!) As for what kind of relationship I’m looking for, it depends on the person; whether we want to spend a lifetime together or just one awkward dinner (or anything in between), we’ll just have to see.
Things I’m not looking for: If sharing your religion is important to you, I’m probably not the guy for you (you ain’t getting me in a church without a gun!) and I’m also not interested in the drinking life. I don’t regularly drink or hang out at bars as a general rule, but if you like the occasional drink, that’s fine with me.
I don’t have much else to add to this profile and so I’ll leave it at this: so long, and thanks for all the fish!
Conversation Starters (i.e. what you'd like to do on a first date...)
I could use help on my zombie apocalypse bus, so welding would be a big plus! If that's not appealing, just something casual where folks can talk...or a trip to Paris for wine and cheese, if you're buying.