What has four wheels and flies everywhere?
A trash truck. A little silly but I heard a young boy tell that joke to his father the other day in the hardware store and I have to admit that I laughed.
---- Okay, back to my self-summary. ----
THE SHORT VERSION: For the folks that like short profiles, here you go: Mainly, I'm looking for a woman that does not have children. After all, I'm not bringing you a ready-made family! She should also want to live a childfree life as I do. Relationships are all about compromise and children is one area where you can't compromise: You can't meet in the middle and have half a kid. That'd be pretty strange (and gross). This does not mean I hate kids. My sisters kids are totally well behaved and pretty cool. Heck, I probably like them better than I like her...ha. And if you're attractive possibly having brown hair and/or eyes, well, that doesn't hurt either...haha. If you're fanatically religious, we can be friends, but that's it. Because, well, adults with imaginary friends are scary! I'm probably flexible with most other details, sorta...haha.
THE LONGER VERSION: Yep, this is long. What does that mean? It probably means I give a sh!t. I'll let you decide whether that's a good or bad thing in regards to relationships: which kind of guy do you want? For the more detail oriented type that feel it makes lots of sense to read about someone before contacting so you can actually see if you're compatible without wasting anymore of your or my time, this ones for you:
I did my best to make this a fun and easy read because who the heck wants to read something as boring and dry as a textbook? I tried (and failed) to make my profile short but communicating can be so much fun, right?! But I am an open and transparent person and I believe you should know a little about someone before contacting them. Alas, most people really only care about the pictures anyway, right?! Go ahead, grab some popcorn...and put some extra butter on it...haha.
Women complain a lot that most guys don't put much in their profile. I have to agree with them, who wants to see a weak profile? Well, sometimes, believe it or not, I get complaints that my profile is too long! So I'm screwed if I do and I'm screwed if I don't. Sometimes being screwed is okay, but probably not regarding my profile. But I will say this: Nobody's forcing you to read this! You can always move on to the next profile if you wish..ha. But for the few that have interest, it's here for you to bathe in...haha. I have been described as an intense and passionate person at my core buffered in a thick layer of silliness, laughter and fun. That's probably pretty accurate. Having balance in life is important to me, especially regarding those attributes.
87% of the profiles I see are exactly the same, and, unfortunately that gets old. So, I took a different approach and tried to describe how I may not be all that average. Sometimes women make the mistake of assuming what I wrote below is also what I'm looking for in a mate. Well, you know what they say about ass-u-me'ing. I am simply describing ME, as this is MY self summary, so please don't think you have to be just like me. Who wants another me around anyway? I'd rather have a you around.
It's true there are many things that set me apart from the average American. I don't use facebook/twitter, I don't care who the celebrities marry or date, I don't wear sports jerseys, ed hardy, affliction or anything loudly displaying (advertising) some company logo. I do not like extended bouts of texting as a form of an actual conversation (sending small notes or pieces of info is fine) otherwise just freakin' call me so I'm not left tapping on some tiny screen all night...haha. I like a lot of sports but I don't follow any of the big three American sports (football, baseball or basketball). Sports that interest me are BMX, mountain biking, racquetball, soccer, hockey, water sports and others. I recycle/reuse/re-purpose just about everything and I never litter. I don't want kids and I'm not religious.
My TV never gets turned on because I'm usually doing something - but watching a movie on the home theater with your mate is fun. I probably like the majority of the people I meet, but I like 100% of the animals I meet. I don't care if you're black or white, gay or straight, male or female...if you treat me with respect and have a brain, we'll get along. I don't care about keeping up with the Joneses and I've never paid any intere$t, to any institution/company/bank/credit card, in my whole life; not a penny. I never take my car to a mechanic because I do the work myself. That goes for anything that needs to be done on my home as well. Oh, I don't have any tattoos and I don't smoke pot, either. I know that last sentence makes me a total outcast in my native Southern California. I'll let you decide how much you think that bothers me.
See, I told you I sorta walk to the beat of my own drum..ha However, I'm sure I also share lots of similarities with people in general: Trying to enjoy life as much as possible because you only get one shot at it, liking good times, laughter, fun and smiles. Intelligent conversations and having a blast with your mate no matter what it is you're doing is when you know things are good. I only need one good woman so cheating or living the polyamorous lifestyle is not something I'm interested in. Serial dating is not my cup of tea. Earl grey is good, though. With honey and a little cream.
Finding someone to hang out with when we are both free, only to find out after awhile that we both yearn to see each other again, time after time, would be groovy. If things progress to where we both fall for each other, well, I wouldn't resist as I don't have emotional issues like many of the poor souls do that I've met off here. My parents are still married after 50 years so I saw first hand what it takes to make a relationship work. I was lucky to have good role models as nobody can choose the parents they have.
I am patient and do not mind taking things slow and naturally, as relationships that endure were never rushed. Who wants instant coffee when it's better to brew for a while...haha. You know, a real relationship: Something that starts naturally, organically and harmoniously with smiles, laughter and fun! Ultimately finding a woman that fits me like a glove would be nice. With seven billion people on the planet, I'm sure she's out there somewhere. If the above is someone you may have an interest in hanging out with, you know what to do!
*** Edit: If your message is going to contain like two words (like 'wut up'), don't bother!