The problem...They've always said there's plenty of fish in the sea, but never before has that sea of fish been right at our fingertips. It's too easy in our modern age to find one thing we don't like about a person and with a click of the mouse, on to the next profile..or lack there of most of the time. Dating has turned into window shopping. Ordering up a human being like we order up some pad thai. We think intimacy is in a perfectly executed string of emoji or the amount of facebook likes for a changed relationship status update. We think effort is a good morning text. We say romance is dead because maybe it is, but maybe we need to reinvent it. Make your own instead of what other people tell you it is.
Maybe modern day romance is putting the phone down long enough to look into each others eyes at dinner. Maybe it's deleting Tinder or POF off your phone after an incredible first date instead of leaving one eye wandering at other options. Choice is killing romance because we're one foot out the door from date number one, because outside that door is more, more, more. We long for something perfect, something we compare to movies, instagram, illusions of perfect facebook couples. We are the comparison generation. Always wanting what it seems someone else has and always believing there is something better coming. Shiny pictures, happy couples, perfect love. We measure up ourselves to something that just doesn't exist. A relationship is 3 am fights, reddened eyes, tear stained bed sheets and it's also compromise, admitting flaws, opening up and letting go. We worry about settling. What is settling? If it's not "perfect," it's settling. If it's not glittery filtered love full of unrealistic expectation than it's settling. I will settle for simple and pure any day.
What I want...I want phone calls; to see a face absent of the blue dim of a phone screen. Long distance good night kisses, thoughtfulness, simplicity, appreciation for the little things, effort and initiative, child like excitement and laughter.I want a love that builds, not a love that is discarded for the next best thing. We want to come home to someone, to lay our heads down at the end of the day and know we lived well.