Buy you food.
Try to stay awake when you put in The Note Book.
Show you off to my friends.
Take turns cooking dinner. (And do the dishes.)
Change the brakes on your car.
Touch your butt.
Send you Avett Brothers lyrics.
Laugh at you when you do goofy things.
Pretend I forgot your birthday and then surprise you at work.
I will not...
Protect you from snakes. (Sorry you're on your own.)
Change the TV channel when you're not looking.
Ignore your texts.
Wipe my nose on the couch.
Judge you for having more than 2 cats.
Leave the toilet seat up.
Forget when we have a special date night.
Get angry when you laugh at me when I do goofy things.
Umm... I'm a nice guy. If I'm picking on you it means I like you. I won't like insult your grandma, I mean I will point out something goofy you are doing.
I work hard. I play harder. Sarcasm is my middle name. Honest to a fault.