Talk about myself.... ok. I am talker! lol But if you really want to know about me then you are going to have to TALK to me. I can talk... A LOT! Perhaps you may want to skip to the bottom where it says "NOTE" before you continue. I have recently updated the notes to my already lengthy profile. Sorry.
Still here? Okay!
I will tell you I served in the USAF, I chase critters and sing in a swing band. I like sushi, NASCAR, animals and I LOVE cake! I am a goober to be sure... Making jokes and laughing easily. I am capable of taking care of myself, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate the man that will be a gentleman and treat me like the lady I pride myself to be. Though if you knew what I did for a living, you would wonder how that is possible. Lol! I clean up real well. I promise!
Being an entertainer (in my spare time) I am not a shy person.I love to sing and make people laugh. But I do have my moments of quiet introspection,so don't take it personally if I am not too social. Adventure is my middle name and I will try anything once... well almost anything. Not much frightens me, except the dentist... and bedbugs!! Yikes!!! (I have never had bedbugs. Just saying)
I have had my share of disappointment with the men on this site. Is it that difficult to be genuine? Really? Tired of the "I don't want drama line" and yet they create it with disrespect and dishonesty. I am not looking for the boy that wants to sleep with me... I am looking for the MAN that wants to wake up with me. I am confident... until someone makes me feel as if I am unlovable. I try to go into this experience with no expectations...other than respect.
However, being a hopeless romantic... I want "the one." When you meet someone for the first time "fireworks" are great and all... but it has been my experience, just like actual pyrotechnics, that they don't last and burn out quickly. I want a relationship that is going to "smolder" over time. I won't jump into the fire. I am tired of getting burned. But I won't overanalyze it to death either... if it feels amazing and I'm happy, I have no problem letting you know. No" what ifs"... no regrets.
I want to be that older couple that makes younger people go, "Eeeeeeeew!" when we are seen showing each other affection (not obscene) in public. And I am looking for the man that can hold my attention no matter what the topic... make me laugh when I want to cry and not make fun of me when I do. I am looking for that person that wants all of me...not just my highlighted parts (referring to tanlines here). But I also want a man that wants to swallow me in one, greedy gulp. :) PASSION! The best word in the words of... well... you know; Other than ones a lady won't put in print. ;)
I love to travel, but have to say the USA has my heart... Alaska was the trip of a lifetime (twice) and I didn't take a cruise either... really good story there. Perhaps one day soon I will share it with you.
NOTE: - Please do not send naked pics or bathroom mirror pics with your shirt off (ick)
- If you haven't been divorced for at least a year...call me in a year ( hopefully I'll be off this site by then )
- If you are looking for a "hook up" move along
- If you want nothing more than a texting buddy and can't call me like a man...go back to jr. high already
- If you believe in breakups over the phone, or you're too much of a coward to tell me in person... you aren't man enough for me
- I will travel for the right guy, but if you think driving a mere 1/2 hour doesn't work for you "logistically," you are lazy and not seriously
looking for a relationship
- If you make a date with me and then stand me up because you chose to go out and get hammered with your buddies... you have
an obvious drinking problem and need to get help.
- If you have kids under the age of 17, that could be a deal breaker. I don't want to raise someone else's and I am incapable of tolerating
children whom are disrespectful of their hardworking, caring, loving fathers. And if they are girls... NO WAY! NO HOW!
- If you tell me, " I can't possibly understand because I don't have kids," you obviously can't handle an objective viewpoint...that's like
saying an Oncologist can't treat cancer because he has never had it. UGH!
- And there is nothing worse than a coward that will use his kids in some capacity as an excuse to break up with someone when he has
found greener pastures. Jerk...
- I speak plainly...say what I mean, mean what I say. If that is too "intense" for you...go away (hey! that rhymes!)
- I make mistakes. I am not perfect. If perfection is what you're after...go to heaven and meet God.
- I am a smart girl...remember that when you think you're putting one over on me
- Oh! And if you are in law enforcement, corrections, etc. pass me by... PLEASE... way too many issues and excuses to list here
- If you are a "stupid stud" and can't put a sentence together...forgetaboutit
- If you're jealous and judgmental before we even meet...you're done
- Must have all your teeth... I have all of mine
- I am not into skinny men...but I don't want to be crushed by one either
- If you are incapable of opening a door for or paying the smallest of compliments to a lady...you've got to go
- If you can't laugh...really laugh at the silly things I say... you are not for me
- If you are afraid of mice or squirrels or bats... well, you know what to do....
-OH!!!! I almost forgot one more VERY important thing... if your head and/or neck are bigger than your hips...Hell! If they are bigger than mine, please "pick your things up and put them down" far, far, away from me! And if you didn't get THAT, you have obviously been living under a rock and I don't think we need to go any further.
" If you can't handle the worst of me, then you certainly don't deserve the best of me..."
~ Marilyn Monroe
Don't make me fall if you don't have plans to catch me...
I want to love hard and grow old with my best friend...
Just because you admit you're an ass, doesn't make you any less of one...
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