Aint the best in the world but im the best u've seen!!!
-My blood smells like cologne.
-On every continent in the world, there is a sandwich named after me & my hands feel like rich brown suede.
-Cuba imports cigars from me. Mosquitos refuse to bite me purely out of respect. In museums, im allowed to touch the art.
-My business card simply says “I’ll call you.”
-I have won the lifetime achievement award, twice.
-If I were to punch you in the face, you would have to fight off the urge to thank me.
-I bowl overhand.
-Im fluent in all languages, including three that I only speaks.
-I tip an astonishing 100%.