If you are intelligent, tall, and in shape I might be interested in you, maybe. If you can keep a conversation, enjoy what life has to offer, and always seeking the next adventure, you've got a chance. If you have been abducted by aliens or have a pet unicorn then I am definitely interested...shoot me an email with photos of the alien/unicorn so we can get started on a Weekly World News story!
I'm not interested in the short term hook-ups, nor do I have time to deal with petty drama. There are too many things in this world for me to waste time on either of those, like planning my garden or hiking through the cascades, like hitting the gym or cooking breakfast for family and friends.
One more thing, stop sending me emails with short "You're cute" or "Hi!" phrases. If there's no coherent thought in the message I'll find that delete button faster than you can read those 2-3 words.
Enjoy your stay, clean up after yourself, put the toilet seat back down, and don't eat all the food.
If that wasn't clear enough, well written applications are being accepted for a gal who is a great blend of getting dirty and dressing up. Compensation DOE; including, (but not limited to), whimsically improvised scrumptious meals, occasional baked goods, titillating conversation, and a contagious smile. Dinner/breakfast arrangements available after 90 days.
Bonuses are inspired at random and may include unexpected acts of creativity and kindness.
Strong preference for those taller than 6'2 1/2", athletically built, great kissers with a smile to match, a witty sense of humor, educated (i.e. socially adept engineers and attorneys), possess superb writing skills and the normal manly skills, like building/fixing things and proficient in basic vehicle maintenance. Firearm friendly would be great. Someone who can challenge me mentally, physically, and emotionally would be fabulous. And if you can play the guitar and sing well, I definitely want to hear from you.