Oh, hello. I didn't see you there. Welcome to my profile. Let's begin, shall we?
I'm just a shy Irish boy... Trying to make his way in this crazy, crazy world.
(BY THE WAY, LADIES... This isn't 1920. It *is* actually socially acceptable to initiate contact with a guy that you might be interested in. Be BOLD. Bold = Sexy.)
I love to be active and outdoors. Especially near water. Love to wakeboard, wakeskate & wakesurf (see pictures). I love to swim, hike, mt. bike, snowboard, surf, ride dirt bikes & street bikes, 4x4, go for walks, play guitar, look at the stars, watch the sunrise, watch the sunset, stare at the moon, play with my dog, chill with friends, watch sports... I could go on for days... Ask me.
YOU SHOULD MESSAGE ME, IF:
1) You're not a snob.
2) You're not into drama.
3) You're not into mind games.
4) You're looking for someone who is active but also likes to chill out on the couch and watch a movie or some TV like Game of Thrones, Breaking Bad or Sons of Anarchy.
5) You know what's important and are head strong enough to filter out the BS.
6) You're looking for a guy who is going to treat you with kindness and respect.
7) You want to be with someone who enjoys being spontaneous and trying new things.
8) You're someone who thinks you have a lot to offer to someone. The same someone who has a lot to offer you.
9) You like reading things in list form.
10) Nothing really to say here, just wanted to end on 10.
This next list will probably make you think I'm a huge a-hole. I assure you, I'm not. I just don't want either of us to waste our time if you fall under any of the following 5 categories. Ok, here goes... (Remember: Not an a-hole)
You should *NOT* message me if:
1) You have "ex" issues of any kind. I'm over mine. The fact that you're on a dating site should mean that you're over yours, too.
2) You enjoy getting cross-eyed drunk and dancing on top of bars. This tells me several things. You're an alcoholic. You crave negative attention because you have "Daddy" issues. You feel that's the best way to get attention from men because being yourself just doesn't seem to work.
3) You get turned on by Neaderthals who start fights in bars. This tells me that you're basically an idiot and you have yet to understand what is and what is not important in life.
4) You like guys who wear "Affliction" shirts who feel the need to broadcast their testosterone at all times. This is called "over-compensating." Those of us that are confident and comfortable in our own skin don't need to do this. Grow up and move along.
5) You like to point out other people's faults but refuse to look in the mirror and see your own. This tells me that you're a huge hypocrite and have to knock other people down to keep yourself from feeling inferior. (See: Chronic insecurity, inferiority complex, huge b!T€h syndrome)
Stay tuned... More to come as they happen.
Please understand the following:
I AM *NOT* HERE LOOKING FOR EROTIC CHAT!!!
I AM *NOT* HERE LOOKING TO SEND YOU PICS OF MY JUNK!!!
I am a respectful man who is sometimes too nice for his own good. People try to take advantage of my niceness a lot. Do not mistake my kindness for weakness. You'll be sorry you did. Thank you, that is all. ;-)
1) I smell like shit. I mean.. I spell like shit. (Bazinga!! I spell just fine. And I smell even better!!)
2) I haven't cried since Troy Aikman retired.
3) I take my coffee black... Like my men. (If you can name the movie that this quote came from... I may ask you to marry me... Or at least give you a nice long smooch.)
4) I find it absolutely ADORABLE when women snort when they laugh. Seriously. No sarcasm intended. Adorable.
5) I have actually seen "The Notebook" and I didn't have to be tied down and forced to do so. It's actually quite romantic.
6) Ok, don't tell my guy friends about #5.
I have a reputation to maintain. I'm trusting you on this one.
7) You're still here, and I think that's awesome. I find your curiosity pleasantly childlike. You're doing great so far... Keep reading.
8) If mosquitos only live for 1 day, does that mean if they skipped breakfast... They had a bad childhood?
9) Remember: Time flies like the wind. Fruit flies like bananas. *rimshot*
10) Once again, the "end on 10" rule I had mentioned earlier. That's called a "call back," ladies and germs.
Well.... Congratulations!! You made it all the way to the end of my novel. Therefore, I think it's safe to assume that you have the patience of a saint and I probably want to meet you. Thanks for dropping by... My secretary will validate your parking on your way out. Drive safe.
Someplace we can talk. Doesn't matter where. Coffee, dinner, drinks... I care more about getting to know you than where we are.
If you're looking for a pen-pal... Might I suggest writing an inmate. I know this is gonna make me sound like an A-Hole, but, please don't message me unless you're actually interested in meeting up at some point in the near future. Im not looking to message you for 3 weeks only to have you flake out and fade into silence. Move along, nothing to see here.
If you don't know a good thing when it's standing right in front of your face... Move along, nothing to see here.