Ok, so a little about me/my values: I have come to believe that friendship is the basis of every kind of chemistry, and that people can only really become friends when we’re being ourselves – as in who we actually are, authentically. There are a lot of things/qualities/experiences that I want to give to the man that I end up being with, but I think the most valuable of them is being a true friend. With friendship comes respect, trust, and knowing that we are in each other’s corner. When I'm inspired by something or someone, I am naturally generous, and have a lot of smiles, laughter, curiosity, moronic humor and emotional depth to share with the right person. I also trust my instincts, and for that reason I am willing to take a few risks. So there's that.
In terms of what I am looking for? I’m attracted to men with an above average degree of self-awareness. You are potentially a good fit for me if you know who you are, what you want, and have the willingness to communicate that. For me, communication is huge. I admire men who can express their ideas and opinions; who think contextually as well as literally, and who can both withstand and return a little smack talk. I like being around people who routinely laugh at themselves (and - let's be honest - at others... including, of course, me!). In terms of the form a relationship takes, I am not so much interested in what is "right" or "wrong," and way more interested in what actually works. I’m not sure I want to get married again, for a lot of reasons. Mainly because, in my mind, a good relationship is one that is built from the ground up with plenty of room for individuality and autonomy in addition to intimacy and connection. It's also important that I am with someone who exercises and takes care of his body.
** Update as of January 2015: A couple things, just for housekeeping and to save us all a bit of time… 1) You may have met people on here (I have) who tell you they are not interested in emailing or texting back and forth, but then continue to email or text you endlessly. I am legitimately one of those people who will not continue to communicate like that. So if you think we might have a connection, you should give me your number or ask for mine as soon as possible so we can talk on the phone and figure out if we want to meet. No, talking on the phone is not the same as meeting in person, but it conveys more info than typing into a little rectangular box, and that is a solid start. 2) I never answer "wants to meet you" or one line emails like "hey sexy" or "how was your new year." That to me is to online dating profiles what McDonald is to food. It shows that either you didn't read what I took the time to write, or worse, that your criteria is only about looks. I don’t judge; I just delete.
Let' s be honest: The first date is not a date!
Only if there is a second date would the first date then technically qualify as a first date.
That said, meeting up on a weeknight usually works best for me.