Not looking for perfect... Just perfect for me!
I do not normally respond to just “winks” / "wants to meat" / "favorite me" / "friend requests" (If you can't bother to send a message, why should I. Lol.)
I am so tired of short 1-3 word messages. Ugh! PLEASE be more original and have something nicer to say than; "Hey sexy",
"Your so beautiful", [btw, it's -you're- guys, not your], "U r so hot". Etc. These "appearance only" comments tell me you have no depth and all you care about is the physical and nothing else, which probably means you're shallow and looking for just one thing. FYI, hearing you are "hot", "sexy", "smokin" just sounds sleazy from total strangers. (and not at all romantic btw, please use better words guys! ) I may like hearing that from a boyfriend or a husband... but not from men whom I don't even know. I know A LOT of women who agree. GOSH, are there ANY men out there who don't expect to have sex in the first stages of just getting to know someone?? Geez. That's why I prefer to start off getting to know someone as a friend first.
Also, don't get mad at me for not responding back. When a person gets 30+ messages a day, it's impossible to return all of them.
I get asked all the time; "Why are you single."
Well, I would rather be single than be with the wrong person, that's for sure. Note, I was with the one man (my ex) from 1993-2008. (15 years) I have been officially divorced since 2011. So far, I haven't found what I'm looking for. It's that simple.
A quick synopsis about me.... I was born in California, was raised for 12 years in Las Vegas, and have been living in Cali since 1982. I was raised Catholic, but consider myself more spiritual than religious. I have one child who is grown and living on her own. I love kids, but I don't want to "physically" have any more children. I was a dance instructor / studio owner for about 25 years. Math and Art were two of my favorite subjects in school. I enjoy staying in shape and being healthy. However, I am not a huge outdoor or sports enthusiast. So, that stuff you would be doing mostly on your own. :) And in case you don't notice, I love cats. (All animals actually) I do volunteer work at a local adoption center every week. My interests are listed. So please don't ask "what do you like to do?"
- A man with class*, manners* and chivalry*! A man who knows how to treat women properly.* (Why is this so hard to find? It shouldn't be.)
- A man who is MORE interested in "getting to know me", than "getting into my pants". *
- A man who eats healthy, works-out and cares about his appearance*. (Why is this also so hard to find?) I prefer slim and slightly muscular. (Swimmers type body. I do not prefer too overly muscular men, nor do I prefer chubby types.)
- A man who is financially stable.* (Of course.)
- A man who owns his life. He is not dependent on anyone else for the things he has. i.e.; Owns a car, owns a house, and it's a 'plus' if he owns his own business, is the boss, or is retired. (This way our life doesn't revolve around "the man". Lol)
- A man who has life experience. For example; been married (or been in a long term relationship before), has maybe had kids already. Also, knows how to build, fix, repair things, and can cook somewhat.* (Things like that are very sexy.)
- A man who is KIND*, helpful*, generous*, loyal*, trustworthy*, and caring*. (VERY important!)
- A man who is humble, with subtle confidence.* NOT arrogant!
- A passionate conversationalist, capable of talking about almost any subject with intelligence*. A large vocabulary, and must be literate!* (Knowing the difference between your and you're, and knows that "a lot" is two words, for example.)
- Witty, funny, and a good sense of humor is wonderful! (Make me laugh a lot, and I'm hooked. Lol)
- A man that can actually have fun "indoors" and isn't a full blown outdoors type. I probably will not get along well with a guy who can ONLY have fun doing "outdoor" activities. (Notice my list of interests demonstrates this.)
- A man who likes to give and get massages. (One of my favorite things to do.)
- If I don't have to worry about BC, then that is a gigantic plus....if you know what I mean ;) (This is more for the older men.)
- A man who is strong and protects his woman* (without being a scary bully or thug) It always feels good to feel safe around a man.
- I prefer no tattoos, but wouldn't let that be a deal breaker.
- A man who knows how to dress well and carries himself well in those clothes*.
- I prefer no facial hair, no back hair and no hair down there. Eyebrows under control and no ear or nose hair.* lol
- A man who takes care of his hands, feet and nails is awesome! If you will go with me to get manis/pedis, that's even more awesome!! :) Yes, straight guys go to the nail spa, lol. :)
- I am usually attracted to men who are 6 ft or taller.
- A man who loves (or at least likes) cats!
- A man who does not allllllways have to be watching sports. (They do exist.)
- A great smile is a big turn on. Nice white straight teeth, and fresh breath.
- A gravitate to men who are calm, cool, and mellow. (But that doesn't mean quiet) - Confident, in a relaxed non-pretentious way.
- Tech savvy / Computer savvy is always a good thing, especially for me cuz I need that. (I do not want to know more about techy gadgets than my boyfriend.) If you can Skype or FT, that's a plus.
- A man who thinks with his head AND his heart. Not just one or the other. A man who is in touch with his emotional self and knows how to manage it well.
- A man who can control his temper and is responsive to a woman's feelings.* I love men who can remain cool and caring under pressure! :)
Keep in mind the above isn't a "must have" list. Simply a look into what "type" I like. So, please don't send me a message that says "you are never going to find all that". To tell you the truth, I have come VERY close, more than once! (And wouldn't I know this better than you?)
For the .01% who feel the need to send me "hate mail" over my profile. All you are doing is proving my point. Also, notice that most of the things with an * (asterisk) I SHOULDN'T even have to mention, and it's sad it isn't a quality in every person. Those alone are the majority of my likes, and would be for most women. (My list would be 80% shorter if people could just be decent.) Plus, sending hate mail is just making yourself look bitter and classless. Obviously, you don't possess the qualities above and all you are doing lashing out and showing you are insecure about it. Weeding out your "type" out is exactly what I'm trying to do. Thanks for showing me it's working. Lol. So get over yourself and learn to show some respect for others opinions. The last time I checked, I was allowed to have one of those.
I must get to know you before I will agree to a date. Personality and character are paramount, in my book, and I have to stop wasting time on pointless dates. I am only looking for something serious and I don't want to waste my time or yours, if there isn't a strong chance there could even be a logical future. (And if the word "future" scares you, then best I know that now. Lol) So, be prepared to answer a few questions before I agree to meet you. If you can't bother to do that, then you are not the right kind of guy for me. I have also been deceived by so many guys who don't post up current photos of themselves, I sadly now have to insist that we either Skype or FaceTime each other before going out. Sorry, but I'm tired of the inaccurate photos.
Dinner and good conversation. Or, maybe something involving a common interest.
If I go out with you, it means I'm very interested, and I won't bother with someone who is only interested in me enough to buy me a drink. Sorry, but, I would rather stay at home than waste my time with just a beverage.
"Coffee is cheap, drinks are an audition, lunch is an interview..... dinner is romance."
PS - REGARDING PHONE NUMBERS BEING GIVEN OUT....
Please don't ask me to give you my number in your first couple message. I get asked that every single day. I get that emails are "laborious". (PLUS, guys majorly lack patience "these days"!) === Gosh, men had soooo much more patience 50+ years ago, when courting a woman.=== Some of you men need to understand something.... When a gal gets asked for her phone number 30+ times a day, do you guys think it is really safe, possible or even logical for her to hand out her number to THAT MANY total strangers? Before knowing hardly anything about them?? I obviously can't give my number to every Tom-Dick-and-Harry that asks for it. Lol. Do you know how many psychos would be calling me if I did that? I am NOT going to let 30+ men per day have access to my number!! That's not even feasible. Plus, I need to get a better feel for a man's "character" and "personality" before I will give out my private information. Otherwise, who knows how many weirdos would be calling me. (I learned that the hard way.) - Think of it this way.... Would you go up to a girl in a bar or restaurant and say nothing to her but.... "Hi, give me your number!" .... No. I don't think so! You would talk about some stuff first and try to get to know each other a little bit. Right? So, do the same here!!!! If you don't have any patience or time to chat a few times, you are not for me. I certainly don't want to be with a person with such a lack of patience. Ugh!
I also suggest those types I mentioned just DON'T DO the whole online dating thing. Some guys need to CHILL, and stop being so damn impatient! Lol. That's just part of the pains when you sign up for this venue. Get used to it, or go out and back to meeting women in person. - Fini
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