Before we proceed i will be GOOSE and you will be MAVERICK
The Perfect Woman: Drinks. Burps the Alphabet. Devours a bucket of Wings while watching the Football Game. Finds your missing dirty sock. Has a good sence of Direction. Loves Bacon. Stays mainly in the Kitchen.
Well that escalated quickly...
I would do battle with a pack of wild mountain lions inside of a handicapped stall at a local McDonalds with my hands zip tied behind my back and a shakeweight super glued to my forehead as my only weapon just to get a chance to share a freshly baked pizza pie with you over Skype with a dial up connection.
Why am I on here??? Because i am either DRUNK or BORED.
*Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
*Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.
*The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.
*Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
I love nerds, boobs, porn, beer, football & horror movies. I like my women to make me sammiches nekkid.
Keep Calm and Chive On!