Imagine it: We think up fun stuff to do together—you take me river rafting and I talk you into trying partner yoga, we pick a television show on Netflix and plow through 10 seasons on Tuesday nights, we go do all the cool "date stuff" that Northern Colorado offers like Zombie Crawl, New West Fest, Tour de Fat. We hike, we bike, we go to concerts. We keep toothbrushes at each other's houses. You come to my kickboxing class and you're super impressed by my badassery. You flex your muscles moving and fixing things for me, I add that feminine touch to your life that you're craving, wearing pretty dresses because I like the way you look at me. We laugh until our sides ache. We send each other endearing texts. We have someone to tell our "stuff" to, "Babe, guess what happened to me today?" and it makes us feel connected.
Remember boyfriend/girlfriend sex? The kind where we get enough practice that we actually get good at it, and it gets more and more exciting the more we do it, learning each other's buttons? That.
I'm happily 42 and I'm used to myself. I'm happy with my life. I have fantastic relationships, I'm a wonderful mother (just ask my 2 school-aged children), I'm passionate about my work as a life and business coach. I'm a professional writer. I'm healthy and in shape. I have a sweet tooth. I'm generous, funny, loyal and an incredible friend and girlfriend. I find the Universe hysterical. I live my life from my Soul, I'm spiritual, I have intuitive gifts and I'm really good at attracting what I want. My Love Languages are Time and Affirmation. Subjects I most like to talk about: God & the Universe + Business. Though less and less political, I vote Liberal and believe that Fox News is a scourge on society with zero positive value, their role is to turn nothing into something by dumping gasoline on it and lighting the match - cheap theater for ratings.
You're used to yourself and accept who you are. You're a good parent, you respect and think highly of your co-parent and you support her—but she's not your best friend. You're sober, fit, healthy and well-established. You're excited by my intensity. You have space and *time* in your life for a girlfriend. You prioritize your romantic/social life. You believe in something spiritual. You're generous with your time, attention and means. You share my World View so this is a non-issue for us.
And it's so easy.
Who's up for a Great Romance? Dates that are about 10,000x more fun than a coffee date, or even a dinner date: go carts, batting cages, tubing on the Poudre, a short hike at Horsetooth, live music on the square, partner yoga class, kickboxing class, breakfast, any of FoCo's festivals, live theater, live music, comedy shows, open mike nights, Ignite Fort Collins, a Burlesque show, anything at Avogadro's Number, 100 things you can get tickets for on Living Social, swing dancing, salsa dancing, dancing at Luscious Nectar, shooting, motorcycle ride, renting bikes and rolling around FoCo, picnics, stroll through the sculpture park, pretending to pick out wedding rings at a jewelers, scouring used bookstores, etc. Points for a quirky date.
I have a theory that when you do something boring with someone you associate them with *being* boring. At least if we go on a fun date we'll have done a fun activity. Right? And maybe it won't feel like business networking.