I think on my feet, I'm often seen climbing walls and crushing walnuts. I have been known to destroy an entire pizza on my lunch break. I translate ethnic slurs for the worlds refugees, I manage time efficiently. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and a veteran in love and war, and an outlaw in Brazil. Using only a comb and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I was scouted by the Mets, because I bat 400. I am the subject of numerous documentaries on Urban warfare. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge. I am an abstract artist, a racecar driver, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. Children trust me, love me, and pets adore me. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Love and War in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire garage that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a hammer and a toaster oven. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have performed open heart surgery... I truly can spread the BS, but if you looking to meet the real me, just ask and I will answer. If you totally believe what you've saw on my profile then your probably not for me. I have a imagination that tends to run wild...... but thats what makes me fun.....lol. We can only go thru life asking and answering questions but if you'd really like to meet the real person in this profile then only you can make this happen by reaching out.