Plato wrote (as his teacher Socrates likely said) the unexamined life is not worth living, I learned in college, and this is where self-examination has led: After so many years of waiting and growing, I seek now to fulfill my dreams and ideals first set in those halcyon sophomoric college years so long ago, of life being based upon trusted and lasting relationships that span decades and lifetimes.
And now, my goal from this point forward is to search for and find at last that one "special someone", with whom I can achieve the tenuous, exhilarating state of intellectual and emotional gestalt, of total honesty and acceptance, trustworthiness and loyalty, of knowing one another's deepest desires and joys and hopes and preferences and fears so well that there is no longer a need to try to paste on a static label to what we are. The ancient Greek philosopher Aristotle is paraphrased as having said it best: "Love is one soul inhabiting two bodies simultaneously." Later this became the basis for the term "soulmates." This is the epitome of true romance to me, a noble challenge, to design our lives to live in this state, and heady indeed would be the woman and man once having achieved that status of one soul together .... no one or thing could possibly come between them after that! :)
That one special person would be sincere, imaginative, sensitive, and affectionate, and open to life being a continual series of changes that we ride out best together in our hearts, the whole being greater than the sum of its parts. She would value and want honesty, mutual respect, admiration, and desire to grow, and bloom as part of a larger relationship that embraces emotional passion and fulfillment as well as lovemaking.
I believe as Kahlil Gibran wrote, that the pillars stand apart yet stand together, and a balance between my hopeless romantic passion and sensible, rock-foundation solid companionate love is the best assurance of my commitment to my soulmate for our lifetimes. Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars. I have learned that our living is determined not so much by what life brings to us as by the attitude we bring to life; not so much by what happens to us as by the way our minds look at what happens. I know the hard way, from too many years with the wrong woman, an ultimately deceitful and adulterous woman for whom I now know only pity and compassion, that life without love, true mutual love, is like a tree without blossoms or fruit.
I now long to meet a truly honest and trustworthy lady, of wisdom and intellect, deep and philosophical, with whom there can be spaces in our togetherness and where the winds of the heavens dance between us. And within which we truly love one another but make not a bond of love: so that it may instead it be a moving sea between the shores of our souls in joyful and willing monogamy, in faith and unbreakable trust, for the rest of our lives.
As for me, I am also funny and serious and kidding around and deep and introspective and philosophical and lighthearted (sometimes all at the same time, too), so please respond and tell me please how all this makes YOU feel. And then perhaps we can meet for coffee and conversation? I will be honored to learn about you.....
PS - in the interests of full disclosure and complete honesty, I am not much of a dancer (except for the tango) so please don't expect me to be a good dance partner or to want to even try. Despite having been a working professional jazz and rock musician for many years in my home town New Orleans area to help pay for what my full academic ride tuition scholarship did not pay for college, I still can't dance. That is it, the only drama in my life, being a very poor dancer....
Oh, and the only photo I have of myself is really the one above and it is about six years old. It is still accurate with the exception of new bags under the eyes from too little sleep and too much work time doing what I enjoy, more smile-lines around the eyes (I spend my days now mostly grinning in the years since the divorce, so everyone at the office says, seriously!), and I now have a leaner face from dedicated daily gym sessions each morning early at the fitness place here in Annapolis. And, the scalp since I started brushing back the combover is growing increasingly air-conditioned ....... so if you don't mind a very tall and muscular, fit man with a truly youthful spirit and demeanor that is showing more shine on top and bits of gray now around the ears nowadays, then I will continue to feel that integrity and outspoken honesty at all costs was worth the telling :)
I am flexible, the venue is far less important than just meeting you and learning everything we want to about one another, in a free open setting that enhances relaxation and a joyful time, completely at ease and focused upon one another. That could be afternoon coffee overlooking the harbor in Annapolis, an upscale sidewalk table in Reston Town Center with a good wine, blue jeans and t-shirts under a riverside awning down in Georgetown on the Potomac, cracking crabs at Cantler's on the Severn River, or your nearest favorite Starbuck's someplace nearby. With me it is all about you - not where we are - and discovering the beauty of the heart and soul within you through your words and smiles that grow more frequent and wider as we talk....
But I DO know some really nice restaurants too here in Fairfax County and the District, and love putting on the suit every now and then for an evening with a very special lady, despite how long I spent in a suit earlier that day!:-)
It will be all about you and learning everything about your heart, your dreams, your inner soul, to me, that is my ideal first date...