facetious-elise: Fun, Intelligent BBW Seeks Smartass Man
Smokes Occasionally with Big & Tall/BBW body type
Sacramento, California
32 year old Female, 5' 9" (175cm), Non-religious
Caucasian, Libra
facetious-elise is looking for a relationship.
Some college
Free Thinker
Payroll Specialist

No makeup... ain't scurred lol

I am Seeking a Man For Long Term
Needs Test Not Completed Chemistry View her chemistry results
Do you drink? Socially Do you want children? Undecided/Open
Marital Status Single Do you do drugs? No
Hair Color Brown Eye Color Grey
Do you have a car? Yes Do you have children? Yes
Longest Relationship Over 2 years How ambitious are you? Ambitious
Pets Dog  

About Elise
Well fellas, what can I say? I'm a brutally honest, open-minded, genuinely sweet woman with a sharp and sassy sense of humor. I love to laugh and I'm the type that can find the "funny" in just about any situation (yes, its sometimes inappropriate, but over the years, I've learned when to keep those giggles silent and just enjoy some thoughts to myself lol).

I'm a very confident woman and love myself completely. I am a big woman (around 5'9" to 5'10" tall and 340lbs - yep, I put that right out there lol). I already know that I'm a beautiful, desirable woman - so, quite frankly, I don't particularly care if you disagree. No disrespect lol... it's just that everyone has a preference, and I respect that. I've been single (yes, by choice lol) for the past two years. I went on a dating hiatus because, well - I was just fed up with the whole scene. I focused on being a great mother to my son, and a better friend to myself. I'm at a point in my life where I know what I want and I'm not afraid of rejection. It's a good place :)

I love music, and have played a multitude of instruments over the years (only instrument I currently own & play regularly is a couple guitars). My tastes are broad and ecclectic - ranging from classic R&B (The Temptations, Marvin Gaye, Otis Redding) to Classic Rock (Rolling Stones, Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Beatles) to blues (Muddy Waters, Robert Johnson, SRV) to hip-hop (Tupac, Eminem, E40, Too Short) to Rock (Kings of Leon, Five Finger Death Punch) to R&B (Bruno Mars, Adele)... I could go on & on. In fact, I think I just did :)

I love football and baseball (although I'd rather GO to a baseball game than watch it on TV... I'll watch a good football game anyday though), the water, outdoorsy stuff (camping, fishing, tail-gating), movies over TV, books over movies, and going out as much as staying in.

What I'm looking for is simple - someone that's capable of holding a conversation, someone that can laugh at themselves without insecurity, someone that genuinely appreciates the person I am and knows when they're appreciated in turn. I am a pretty touchy-feely person (even with my friends - not necissarily a groper, but I tend to touch someones arm when speaking to them, or play with hair when kicked back... so if that's a problem, we're probably not a "looooove connection" lol. I am, however, respectful of people's personal space. I don't just walk up to random strangers and caress them lol. I'm open to all ethnicities and most ages (although I generally prefer to stick with men semi-close to my age... there are exceptions). I have no set "body type" that I prefer - but honesty, integrity, and light-heartedness with a capacity to love is mandatory.

I'm not necissarily looking for a specific relationship either. I just moved back to Sac and am down to make some kick-ass friends as well as pick up a date or two. You never know what kind of relationship you could be missing out on if you're too closed-minded to see it. In other words, I'm not so focused on finding "my man" that I'm ruling out a good friend :) Make me laugh, I dare ya! ;)
Hope to get to know you and see where it leads :)

First Date
I think there is far too much hype surrounding the "first date" (shum-pum-puum!). Its like you're supposed to figure out you level of interest in another human being, complicated creatures that we are, in one afternoon/evening... get the f*ck out of here lol. You barely know anything about anyone deeper than whether or not you're physically attracted to them in such a short period of time. Don't get me wrong, physical attraction is important, but I sincerely think our generation has been programmed to disregard the more important aspects of relationships. So, for me, the ideal first date is fairly whimsical. Don't make plans, just - take a walk and if the chemistry is right, if we're both comfortable, SOMETHING will appeal to us on our journey. Be it an awesome restaurant or laser-tag. The important thing is that we enjoy each others company, and not take the whole "first date" thing too seriously. First impressions are skin deep, its the lasting impressions that matter.