Let's see. I've been on here before, left, and now I've returned. I was married LONG ago and have no kids. I like kids- we have a lot in common. They're easy to be around. Sometimes women are not, and that's why I don't have kids. People say that relationships are hard, but I think that they're with the wrong person. Or making it hard. Which is why I'm single. It's not hard. I like building things. I also kinda like breaking things. If you happen to live in an empty house, and like mid-century modern, you've hit the jackpot. I'm logical, but not always practical. I believe in God. Actually, I don't believe- I know. I move my amp onto the porch and crank it up late at night, because I assume that everyone loves Motorhead. Someone nearby probably hates me. I don't watch sports. Couldn't care less about them. I also don't hunt. If you do- fine- bring home a cow. I'm a backpacker. Here's a tip- you know the hairstyle where you pull your bangs straight back while your sides flap like curtains? It doesn't look good on ANYONE. Here's another: if your page has all of your girly bits hanging out, and you then go on to complain that you're sick of messages from perverts, you're an idiot. I don't drink much beer, but Martinis and Scotch are terrified of me. I mainly watch cartoons. I don't listen to country music, much classic rock, or whiny emo shit. I grew up on punk, if that matters to anyone. I hate antique furniture. I spent a summer in North Dakota. I can't recommend it. I make my own sushi. I smoke a pipe. Sometimes I carve my own pipes. Sometimes I smoke cigarettes to impress the chicks. My best friend is a Corgi. I have a lifelong passion for learning. About almost everything. I have a lot of clothes. I'm punctual. I'm probably boring to people who meet me, because I'm an observer in social situations. I think that there are too many books written by people who have nothing interesting to say. As far as what I'm looking for in a lady- I should address that. Someone who isn't a social conservative and avoids blue eye shadow are musts. I don't tell people what to do, and I don't wanna be told what to do. We're grown-ups. We can do what we want. That said, I also think that traditional gender roles are effective in maintaining long-term relationships. I should probably mention that I DO have a dominant personality, but that's part of being a Scorpio, according to the experts. If you're a lady, I'll treat you like one. In general, I return what I'm given tenfold. In the case of unpleasantness, twentyfold. If you like me, I'll like you more. If you're a princess with a long list of demands and nothing to offer in return, you should re-evaluate your mindset before seeking a relationship. If your page contains any variant of "Move along", I'll assume that you're dismissive and arrogant, and you should leave me alone. Everyone says that they're not looking for a one night stand. I'm not either, since I already have two night stands. You girls whine about guys with no shirts. I'll whine that 2 out of 3 girls on this site sound like they're just looking for something to criticize. Topless guys are far less offensive than petty personalities. Someone genuinely nice would be a good qualifier, I guess. That's rare enough. I'm capable of having a real conversation, and I hate small talk. I don't date more than one girl at a time, and would probably like it if you didn't date girls at all. I feel guilty if I CHAT with more than one person at a time, and you should, too. If you click "Meet me", you'd better have your shoes on. Don't put me in your "favorites" if you don't have time to send a message. Is everyone here just window shopping or what? Does anyone actually try and meet? I'm not here to waste my time. If you're terrified of meeting someone from the internet, why in the hell are you on a dating site? Let's do something! I'll add more as it seems relevant.
Drinking until our obvious connection leads us to making out in the bathroom, and then telling our friends we met at work. I doubt we'll get that far. This place seems to be full of people looking for eternal pen pals. We should start somewhere, though. Anywhere but Minnesota.