I am a 29 yr old Jewish female (no, I don't care if you're Jewish as long as you're not super religious and creepy). I moved to the Bay Area from Missouri about a year ago - am spunky, quick-witted, attractive but "thick", short, sarcastic, sensitive, and impatient. I enjoy making frequent sexual jokes, making jokes that are in "bad taste", writing, socializing, hitting the gym, hiking (my favorite spots are in Marin, Sausalito, and Half Moon Bay), yoga (particularly if it's outdoors) and used to be pretty good at tennis. I also recently joined a Kabbalah class and taking it pretty seriously lol. I am a Master's graduate in HR but don't like to talk about smarty pants serious issues like politics, work, or religion. I'm more interested in your sense of humor, confidence, FUN-NESS level and ability to relax and have a good time. I'm very impressed with someone that 'gets' me or understands my sense of humor as not many men do (although I have more than average extremely close female friends). My sense of humor is extremely sarcastic and blunt, so many tend to be surprised when they discover how romantic, sensitive, and passionate I am. like to talk about myself (who doesn't?) but will listen to you if you have something interesting to say. I mainly like old motown or hip hop/r&b/soul music like: Nicki Manaj, Amy Winehouse, Kanye, Drake, Temptations, Al Green, Stevie Wonder, Erykah Badu and lately loving Regina Spektor, Mumford and Sons, Patty Griffin, Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros, Alabama Shakes, John Mayer. I hope to hang out with cool, professional, got your sh*t together men who enjoy socializing, enjoying an alcoholic beverage, making inappropriate jokes, and being affectionate/spontaneous/non-cheesy romantic. I'd prefer someone with a college degree. Although I have my own goals, Im finally at a point where I'm ready to settle down with the right person and check out of the world of dating.
I know this is harsh, but in the interest of saving time, please don't contact me more than ONCE, or if:
you have no picture, or I can't see your face
your main picture is of you shirtless
or with shades on
Or you're flicking off the camera
you have creepy captions under your photo such as, "Let's dance together!!" (apologies to the gentleman who wrote me and told me he removed this from his profile, my bad dude)
you are frequently told you are mean or a jerk etc.
you are not "Americanized"
you are "ghetto" or a "thug"
you have too much gel in your hair (I realize this is all in the eye of the beholder; namely, me)
you like simple women.
you get offended easily or often
a college degree
a great sense of humor (and ppl to verify this)
(of course, I can make exceptions if you're an attractive candidate ;) )
But no seriously, please have nice teeth....
Lastly, I'm a really funny, loyal, passionate and nice person, despite this picky profile.
I like a man that is rough around the edges, a "man's man", that is sincere and honest. I like to be affectionate, and want someone who can laugh and make fun of me AND themselves without getting offended in the slightest.