I am untelligent. Well, so many of you ask for an untelligent woman, I didn't want to let you down.
How about this handle then: The Penultimate Woman
Kidding! I'm not interested in second best.
Or: Catch and Release
Joking again! You gotta know, I'm a keeper.
A poet? You'll know I'm keen for you when I feverishly pen what might, conceivably, maybe, resemble poetry.
I want to partner; what about you, partner?
I'm into simple pleasures,
like making out on the dance floor,
or the geeetar rif in a James Brown song.
A quintessential mix of fragile and strong
Would we get along?
Perhaps, if you are secularist/scientific…I'm non-theist. Mon dieu!
And if you are emotionally and physically affectionate.
And if you prefer questions over conclusions,
And, I must say it, if you are very witty, and love to laugh, a lot.
And if you are easy to be with.
And if you want one woman to love, completely.
I could go on.
Now, I’m a sweet, simple-minded woman. Take the following as case in point:
I may not know
All I can be
But I do know
Are you able to take the wheel? I need a metaphorical brake.
Chain, chain, chains... naw
Ramp to Hell or High Water
Drive on the Correct Side of Everything
To all non-policing men. Approach the vehicle and write your own ticket.
Okay, then skip NOW to "FIRST DATE" and see if that is in ANYway interesting to you.
Let me think.
How about these testimonials*
Reading your profile was more like spending a weekend with you.
Clever and edgy.
Your humor could become an obsession!
Self-admiring obscurantism. (so you say)
*These testimonials are about a profile, not a person, and were written by some loser named Madison Avenue.
Pedestal Rap Trap
Don’t wanna be no angel!
That would be fatal!
Wings are for the Bird that flies free
Like angels can never be.
Alas, another ditty
Wisdom for the Aged:
When one door closes, another refrigerator door opens.
Beware the glove that fits the hand so unbelievably well.
I lost my mind in a wild romance. (Mose Allison)
Projection of our own home movies requires a mirror in every scene. (Does anyone get this? Will you let me know?)
It's actually true, can you believe it? You don't always make it when you try. Just ask 99% of the world's population.
Now reading: Oliver Burkeman's “the antidote: happiness for people who can’t stand positive thinking” . Actually, a very serious work. Positively!
Maybe we match up spiritually. I used to believe in reincarnation, but that was before climate change.
I revere Reverend Billy and the Church of Stop Shopping.
And I traveled with the full-night transit of the Southern Cross, from a beach on Lizard Island, Great Barrier Reef, 1986,
and, I bear the pattern of Orion's Belt on my abdomen, naturally inscribed, I think when I unrolled sometime very early on, so proof positive I'm made of stardust.
To continue (more's the pity), you might be interested to know I once got a
Complement from a MAN!
He said, "Wouldn't ----- be a really FUN wife!"
and I would say this about marriage: I don't believe in the necessity; I do believe in the possibility. How about you?
Now, what to do while searching for the haystack needle?
which reminds me of the slim volume of poetry I once wrote entitled, "Five Years In Bed With The Same Woman".
Take the road that stretches out before you. You know the way; you drew the map. You take it up and you take it down, again and maybe again and again, and then see the smooth stretch before you, then an s-curve, after that a u-turn, your choice but avoid the dead-end, and then you go further, you simply continue because you remember you can keep going if only you keep going, so you do, keep going, and it'll take as long as it takes, and then you'll see you are exactly where you want to be and you see the horizon, the expanse of sky and you, you ah, wait I'll remember, wait, got it, yes, this is where you park it. I'll meet you there; then we'll switch metaphors and fly to the moon.
Or coffee would be good.