Disregard everything below. It is entirely too much information. I will leave it there for the curious but 2014 is the year that I simplify.
I should really consider moving to New York. My particular wit seems to be most appreciated by women in Manhattan, Brooklyn, and Staten Island. I guess me and Snookie would match very low. (Strong swimmers and women who enjoy train rides are encouraged to contact me)
I really need to update this and will do a complete rewrite soon. Right now my profile is a string of incongruent thoughts. I promise to make something a little more cohesive. In a nutshell, I want to meet someone fun that I can connect with intellectually. By intellectually, I dont mean we talk about quadratic equations but just connect by finding the same things interesting and laugh at the same things. I like to discuss politics, news, whether Tarzan could beat Batman in a streetfight, Justin Bieber's sexual proclivities, what the hell was the end of "Lost" about ?, and whether the price of eggs is worth the wear and tear on the chicken's butt. Most people genuinely enjoy my company.
Life is complex. It is more complex for some and I guess we all strive for that perfect balance in someone where the complexities can fit together like a jigsaw puzzle. I always hate when members refer to people as "having baggage". I agree that some people have way too crazy of a life for me. I am a single father of two children that I co-parent with my ex. I suppose they are my "baggage" but equating children to sacks of dirty socks and underwear seems a little insensitive ;) It would be ideal for me to find someone with a proportionate amount of complexity...maybe another single parent on a similar custodial arrangement who has one or two free weekends a month or someone who just works crazy hours. I would like to ammend that previous sentence by stating that I am not just looking for someone to come over one or two weekends a month. I mean that we would be able to make time for each other.
I may or may not have a picture posted. I keep flip flopping on that. I understand that this is basically catalogue shopping for humans and we are visual creatures, if nothing else. Plus, Congressman Weiner stole all my good "go to" poses.
It has also come to my attention that the term to "hang out" means something completely different than I thought it did. Apologies.
I have read so many women's profiles. I like to think we are all complex and layered individuals but it is getting harder and harder to raise my glass and toast that notion. Liking the beach, hating liars, and loving the Caribbean doesn't really say very much. You don't have to be Jane Austen but try to say something that makes you tick other than the usual banalities. That probably came off sounding like a pompous d-bag but we only live once and I have wasted so many years with toxic people. I want to meet someone who can be my friend first and we can se where it goes from there.
I like women who are independent, funny, and can participate in a conversation about things outside of themselves. Do any women like to debate the existence of God or discuss whether man has Free Will? Someone who can be happy staying in and watching a movie, or spending a day at fleamarket.
Some of the political and social absurdities are funny to me. I know everyone always states how important humor is and I agree. If you can both genuinely laugh together, you are connected on a deep level.
I really don't know what I am looking for other than someone who might like to spend some time and talk. Maybe a friendship will be formed. Ultimately we all want the same thing; that tender kiss from someone who moves us intellectually and physically and makes us feel like we belong.
Also, don't be put off by the 'few extra pounds" answer for the body type. I am just being honest. In the internet world that is usually French for obese. That is not the case with me as I am fit. I bike, swim, and lift weights 3 times a week. But I am in my mid forties and am often tempted by the sins of the flesh...so despite my physical regimen, sticking to my diet is always tricky. I am a very attractive guy. Clean shaven, short hair, no tattoos.
I can't really articulate what I want but I will know it when I have it. I just don't want anyone who is very needy or someone whose judgement is clouded by loneliness. I don't dance yet I still feel I might be able to contribute to someone's overall happiness. I'd also appreciate any feedback from someone who actually read all this and tell me if this profile comes off as haughty, creepy, or needy or whatever.
(p.s. you are really not Native American)
First dates can be awkward...can't they?
I guess since everyone else says to go for coffee, I have to say something different.
Maybe we can do some petty larceny ..something to bond us.
A perfect first date for me would have a moment where that first-date awkwardness vaporizes and we talk like old friends.