A poem called:
I'm sorry if I'm not a whore
I'm sorry if my boobs aren't big enough to "satisfy" your needs.
I'm sorry if I'm not skinny enough for you to see my ribs.
I'm sorry if I'm not pretty enough to be "your girl".
I'm sorry if I'm not tanned enough for you
I'm sorry if I'm not a playboy model so I can't act like a porn star for you.
I'm sorry if I'm weird at times
I'm sorry that I write about you every day
I'm sorry if I don't have a dream body that turns you on.
I'm sorry if I'm not tall enough.
I'm sorry if I don't have sex with you on the
first date, or the second, or the third.
I'm sorry if I'm annoying
I'm sorry if my hair is not long enough.
I'm sorry that I'm different from those other girls
I'm sorry I won't hang all over you, and be a complete tramp to make you happy.
I'm sorry that I actually care about you
& actually call to see how you're doing.
But most of all...I'm sorry that most guys can't accept a girl for who they really are........
I'm all about peace, love and happiness or at least I try to be, no one is perfect!!
Hey peoples! I'm Victoria, but everyone either calls me Vicky or Tori. I'm a mother of a 12yr old boy named Gabriel. He's going into the 7th grade and goes to E.O. Green Jr. High(same school I went for Jr. High), yay! I ? him to death!! He can be just like me at times to the point where I can't be around him, which can be annoying :( But I still ? every chance I get to be with him when we are not at each others throats, lol!
This is me in a nutshell, lol:
I can be shy and quiet till you get to know me. I can be a handful at times. You give me drama, I might give it back. I can be sarcastic, mean, and rude at times but I at least I try to be honest and nice about it and say what's on my mind when asked of me.
I do like having a good time. I like a good laugh. I normally don't have those. Sometimes I feel like I'm having a good time but then when asked I seem to tell people I'm having an ok time. My mind keeps going to negative and talking bs to me. I try to be positive, and tell my brain to go **** off but its hard to get those negative assumptions or worries outta my head. I am so not like how I was before I got clean.
I'm still not a PTA, soccer or bake me a cake or cookies mom. Don't get me wrong I love to cook, just don't have all the necessities in the kitchen to do that with. Put it this way, I have been living off and on at the same place for 10 yrs. We have NO STOVE. Also I need the motivation to cook on the hot plates, and in conventional ovens/microwaves.
I ? to swim in the swimming pool and hang out in our jacuzzi at our clubhouse. I like to do some outdoorsy stuff when I feel like doing it. I will only go to pool halls, restaurants/bars that have karaoke or pool tables if possible, because it relaxes my negativity and or stress going on inside. I like the feeling when I'm in front of people singing my heart out, enjoying either them singing along and or applause. I like playing pool with others and not by myself. Kind of beats the purpose of trying to be social and not isolating myself.
I ? dancing, listening to music, playing board games, cards, dice, bowling, ice skating, roller skating, watching live motorcycle/car races, watching any live sport, watching football games when possible, watching certain tv shows, watching certain movies, and I love to try and do new things.
I'm on an APA 8 ball league in Camarillo at Harley's Bowling Alley.
I think I'm doing well. I am a 3. I am not a pro, but I think I can pull my own weight finally.
I like going on the internet to find new things I did not know about life and what's going on in the world.
I ? going to NA meetings and doing NA activities. Been clean almost 18 months now!! Yay!! I have a couple commitments at 2 meetings, that I try to do the best that I can at. I still feel like I'm new to the whole NA program.
I do like to play some video games but I'm not that much of a gamer(only on FB or on my phone). If only I had a nintendo system!! ;)
I'm self employed, and now work for In Home Support Services, finally!! It is the company my mom had been in since I was a teenager.
I will babysit, clean house, and do anything else for people when needed. At times I do charge. I don't depending on the person and what not.
Since I finally have a tax paying job, yay!, I can now finally do my taxes and feel like no one can judge me anymore, because of being on Welfare for so long. I don't believe in using other people for their money or government money even though it seems that way just because I need help. It's not like my son's father is doing anything about giving me money for his son. Try being a white girl and not being able to get a fast food job anywhere in this city, and obviously having somewhat of a record. I am grateful for what is either on my plate or whats around me.
I like volunteering when no one else will.
I'm an animal person. I ? animals of any kind. Even the gross and slimy kind.
I can be a very caring & loving person until you hurt my feelings or piss me off, then you will see the WRATH of MS. TORI!! Lol! J/K!
I ? my higher power, Jesus Christ, my son, my family(who I have left over), my roommates & all my friends on here whether you are a part of me in my life, or part of me on here but far away!!
I ? the Arts, so one day hopefully you will see either a poem I've done, any drawing that I've created, sung one of your favorite songs in person or on youtube, and see me either in a play or tv/film.
I'm happy that I have a little bit of a so-called life. I may not do certain normal things that other people do, (what is normal by the way?) but I at least ? doing what I can do for myself and for others. I can be greedy at times, and not share at times. I may stay home more often than I should but it's only because the world I think is too big for someone like me to mess it up or the world just might mess me up, lol!!
So thanks for reading about me. Now go and HAVE A GREAT & WONDERFUL DAY! PEACE, LOVE, AND HAPPINESS TO ONE AND ALL!! :) ? XOXO
P.S. My mom and friend/boss passed away as of March 19 2011 with congested heart failure :( Love and miss you both!! XOXO!! R.I.P.!!