......... Because this is going to take awhile.
I aspire to be a classically trained piano player, an architect who designs sport and concert venues, the world's best dad, and THE Heavyweight Champion of the World snuggler. I would even settle on being the drummer guy in the first part of the Arcade Fire video 'Wake Up'. But alas, I am none of these things and never will be, except maybe the world champion snuggler(if there was such a thing) I also,think I can hold my own as a good dad.
In reality, I'm a big guy(fat) with a balding head. I own my own car . I rent my little house. I go to work nearly every night. I cuss like a sailor but usually only at work. I have an open mind. I like nearly every type of music made. I drink too much Diet Dr. Pepper. I still believe in opening doors for ladies, kids and older folks.
Some things I believe in:
My family.....Even though they are thousands of miles away
Working hard...even if you are in a job you don't like
Morals....Try to do the right thing by the people in your life even the ones you're not particularly fond of.
Open minds.... I've never understood those who close themselves off to new ways and new things, although I have always struggled with things outside my comfort zone.
Simple is usually better.
Some things you may find interesting and/or fascinating and/or creepy about me that I find to be true.....
• I have part of another human being attached to my body.
• I hate when fat people call themselves fluffy. I curse you Gabriel Iglesias!
• I can't remember faces 5 seconds after I see them unless I know you. (Some of you just thought I was a profile stalker). Ok, I stalk a few profiles because there are some people that I would just like to know but I REALLY SUCK at approaching women.....and/or I like your boobs. HAHA
• I can't sing all the words to a single song except 'Happy Birthday'
• Hipster chicks: "Hot" Hipster Dudes:"Not"
• I don't know who the hell Chuck Palahniuk is but he seems to be popular in these parts(Google here I come)
• I could listen to someone play a piano for hours.
• I work nights, sleep some during the day and get annoyed when I get to work at 10 pm and people say "Good morning David" Really ?
• I also get annoyed when someone calls in the middle of the day, in the middle of the week and ask " what are you doing/ how are you doing?" Umm let me see...How about I call you at 4 am Wednesday and we will talk all about it for hours.
• I don't mind calls from loved ones in the middle of the day in the middle of the week at all.
• I will never be mistaken for a young, hipster, pretty boy..EVER
• I should never be allowed to even consider starting a plumbing project. It will leak no matter what I do or say.
• I enjoy a good many documentaries.
• I've watched someone die and it was horrific.
• I don't have a single picture of me holding a fish.
What I’m doing with my life: Working hard and trying to be the best Dad that I can be.
I’m really good at:
• Being Ornery
• Dancing to cartoon theme songs while I make my boys' breakfast.
Recently from one son to the other: "Is dad dancing again?" "Yup" "Ugh ! How embarrassing"
• Slow dancing with a someone special(You maybe?) in the kitchen, with no music at all playing, while dinner burns on the stove.
• Not knowing how to dance
• Impersonating the Big Announcer Voice Guy who does the commercials for monster truck & motocross events . Can you say, "SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY"
• Kissing the the back of necks and behind ears. It's like an 8 0 8 kick drum.
The first things people usually notice about me:My big head
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food:
Music: David Gray, Eels, Tupac, Blink-182, Boxcar Racer, +44, Angels and Airwaves, Adele, Candlebox, Filter, Beastie Boys, Cypress Hill, Deftones, Snot, Queen, Duran Duran, Flogging Molly, Fort Minor, George Strait, House of Pain, Jay-Z, John Mellencamp, Johnny Cash, Kieth Sweat,Mary J. Blige, Metallica, Missy Elliot, One Republic, Pantera, Smashing Pumpkins,Sugarland,The Cure, Toadies, Train, Willie Nelson,311 Etc. etc. etc.
A few movies off the top of my head:
Lost in Translation,Tombstone(up until Doc dies), Dumb and Dumber, 3000 Miles to Graceland, Braveheart, American Gangster, Exit through the Gift Shop, Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil. My holiday movies are Elf, A Christmas Story, and The Family Man
TV: Sons of Anarchy, Breaking Bad, American Chopper, Mythbusters, Kitchen Nightmares, Cake Boss,Football, Man vs Food, Yard Crashers ,Portlandia , Sopranos, Storage Wars,Lots of Netflix crap
The six things I could never do without:
Diet Dr. Pepper/Diet Coke
Paper(think about it)
Some thing to occupy my mind
I spend a lot of time thinking about:
• My Sons' well being
• Needing to sleep but not wanting to
• Why people from Texas like/need to announce they are from Texas. (BTW. Hi! I'm from Texas)
• Why every single person must point out that they are sarcastic(BTW, Hi! I'm sarcastic)
• My elusive 'Ultimate Playlist'
• How disturbing the following Boom Boom Pow lyrics really are
"Beats so big I'm steppin' on leprechauns
Shittin' on y'all with the boom boom"
• Finding someone to love again
On a typical Friday night I am:
Hanging out with my sons
The most private thing I’m willing to admit:
'F#ck' is a fantastic word as long as you use your own discretion when I dispense the advice to 'F#CK Him', 'F@CK Her', 'F#CK Them', or just plain 'F#CK It'. :)
Have a nice day.