Like most guys on a dating website, I tend to get a massive influx of absolutely next to buggar all by way of messages. As a result I will always do the utmost to overinflate my own sense of importance and act the big I AM wherever possible. Neither do I get a full inbox of women telling me the size of their genitalia, completely oblivious to the fact that I might not even be up for it, or even aware that I may already have my own opinion on weather I want it. A simple chance would be great. The only thing I do know at this jucture is that I am a right cheeky f****r, and yes I do consider myself damn attractive, as well as good in bed. I can sleep for days sometimes, I eat, I fart, I burp, and on a rare occasion I even shag. Oh... and you are not allowed to leave this page until you have atleast had the common decency to read what I painstainkingly took the time to write.Thats me in a nutshell but if you want to know more I have an inbox that needs filling lol
The following criteria is essential:
1. If you have a sense of humor then jog on.
2. If your profile header says "looking for a real man" then f**k off my page right now. I wouldn't be so bold as a man to impose a narrow view of what a real woman is, or how she should be. Please extend me the same courtesy.
3. If you would be offended more than not while hanging with a stand up comic, then we are probably not even going to make it as friends. Just sayin.
The chances of me getting a date with a profile description like this is slimmer than a belemic etheopian. If you are however still reading this and not completely pissing yourself laughing, a simple chat is the preffered way of getting to know each other :)