What's worse than a woman doing the "duck face"? A man doing the "duck face"!!! YIKES!!! LOL!! And if you're going to message me,have a picture attached. Otherwise,I'm not going to reply!
So here we are,a free dating website. I could lie and say I'm a girly girl and only wear heels...But that's simply not true. I'll tell you like it is. Of course I'll do it in a way where I will certainly not embarrass you in front of your friends. I do have this thing most people lack...it's called TACT! As I've said before I'm not a girly girl and I prefer jeans and sneakers. I'm not afraid to get dirty while gardening. At the same time I do know how to dress for an event. I wear makeup if the occasion calls for it,but I will not go out of my way to make myself look like a damn beauty queen just to impress your family and friends. I love all animals including dogs and I also own cats. I have an 8 year old son. Some people call that baggage,I call it a blessing! If you're not willing to accept that then move on. I will not reply to any messages containing: "hey sexy,holla at me mama,how u doin boo?,wuts gud?,wanna git 2gether?". If your baseball cap goes OVER your ears,I have a huge problem with that. FIND A HAT THAT FITS! I have no patience for any ignorant nonsense!! I don't speak ghetto,pull up your pants and get a f***ing dictionary you douche bag! I have an attitude when I need it,so don't think for two seconds that I won't light you up if I feel you need it. I have a huge heart and donate my time as often as I can to shelters(animal and human alike). Intellectual stimulation is as important as sexual. If you want my body,you must have my mind first. Otherwise,go kick rocks!! I have a very small circle of friends that I keep very close. We're much like a family,we argue,laugh,cry etc. I like to cook and I keep a clean home.I got a Kindle Fire and am now addicted to it! I love to read. Anything...mysteries, romance, you name it! There are only two foods I hate on this planet and those are lasagna and peanut butter. I have my reasons and no I'm not explaining them,period. I love the feeling of sand between my toes and running on the beach. I love laughing until it hurts and tears fall. I love playing practical jokes and sarcasm is my second language. It's been almost a year since I quit smoking. I don't mind if you do,but I am not 420 friendly,sorry...I just can't stand the smell of that stuff. I'm not perfect,I don't go to the gym eight times a week and I eat like a pig.I'm not thin,I'm not fat. I have an average body type that actually has curves in all the right places. I weigh 145 lbs and I'm happy with my weight as it is. I've actually received messages saying "you could lose a few pounds" Oh really?? Well,you need to lay off the roids otherwise your weewee is gonna shrink!!.
I like beer,I enjoy wine and I love coffee! I can't stand superficial people. If your shirt costs more than your car payment I'm not sure we'll get along.I'm raising my son to be a gentleman. I would expect anyone trying to get to know me would use the knowledge their parents gave them to treat me as a lady and not some skank in the club. I'd love to see the world...I just lack the funds LOL! I enjoy people watching and seeing the small part of the world I live in. I enjoy the little things life has to offer. I think being licked to death by a herd of puppies is an instant anti depressant. I think a child's laugh is the most beautiful sound on earth. I love music,as long as it doesn't sound like someones trying to skin a cat or growling in the microphone...I'm good! Topics I avoid at all costs are religion and politics. I have my beliefs,you have yours. Lets just leave it at that. I have 3 cats,and no I will not get rid of them. So if you have allergies or don't like them...well...move on,it's as simple as that. I have had them since they were born,so...you go before they do!
Another update: I.DON'T.CARE.ABOUT.THE.CAR.YOU.DRIVE!!!! Nor do I care about how many vehicles you own!! Okay,you have three cars and four motorcycles....BIG DEAL!! Please accept my condolences on the size of your penis!! Materialistic b*stards!!
Quick update: I don't need a website to get laid,I'm not giving you my number after the first two messages and If I do,use it!! I'm not wasting your time so please be courteous and don't waste mine!!
"And I’m doing just fine
I’m always landing on my feet
In the nic of time
And by the skin of my teeth
I ain’t gonna stress
Cause the worst ain’t happened yet
Somethings watching over me
Like Sweet Serendipity"
Don't ask...this song was stuck in my head LOL!!!
Coffee sounds nice :)
I may even show you my impression of "the angry St. Bernard". It's hilarious(thats what I'm told anyway).
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you MUST meet the following criteria:
Age between 32 and 38.
Live in United States
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Must not be looking for Other Relationship
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Must not do drugs
Must not be married
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