toby21136: I take selfies @ funerals and memorials too!
About
Non-smoker with Average body type
City
Reisterstown, Maryland
Details
38 year old Man, 5' 11" (180cm), Non-Religious
Ethnicity
Caucasian Scorpio with Brown hair
Intent
toby21136 Wants a relationship
Education
Some university
Personality
Free Thinker
Profession
small business owner







I am Seeking a Woman For Dating
Needs Test Not Completed Chemistry View his chemistry results
Do you drink? Socially Do you want children? Prefer not to say
Marital Status Single Do you do drugs? No
Pets Cat Eye Color Blue
Do you have a car? Yes Do you have children? No
Longest Relationship Over 5 years How ambitious are you? Ambitious
Second Language Portuguese  


Interests
TomfooleryPublic auctions dressed like a panhandlerTwerking at the food court at local malls
Calling comcast and asking why anyone in their right mind needs 320 channels to watch and just one dThey asked for my ssi and i hung up yelling

About Me
I am amazed how many weirdos are on the internet , .

Hello white male 40 single no kids attractive around 185 5'11" employed owns stuff (well i pay for stuff) likes dancing (but cant dance) long walks on the beach golf all kinds of music pets people , hobbies include but not limited to people watching at the dollar store, annoying the old lady that works at rite aid , prank calling my local bank of america demanding they pay back my tax dollars for their ball out, emailing channel 13's news room telling them marty bass is a douche and demanding the weather and traffic chicks wear tighter shirts (feel free to do the same newsroom@wjz.com ) recently out of jail , my probation officer says i have "real promise"

let me know thanks

its not like i hate fat girls its only because i have a queen size mattress and like to stretch out when sleeping

contact me on Fataintcool on AIM its a work laptop and is always on

I inherited a cat that is ruining my living room wall paper...

i have many goals in life of which one is to say i am sorry to Nicole Eggert for asking if her breasts were real in 1994 at a San Diego auto show (she had me thrown out).

updated 2/2012
Due to shortages in women in the Central Maryland Area, the following categories of unforgivable lowlifes have been promoted to "potential relationship material" for me:

-Liars
-Cheaters
-Daily pot smokers
-My intellectual inferiors
-Dirty, smelly coffee shop poets
-Bar skanks
-Strippers and Hookers.
-Possessive types
-Bitter man haters
-Women old enough to be my Mom
-My Mom
-Anyone else in my family, including the remains of my dead grandmother
-Lawyers
-People who can't spell and refuse to use spell check
-People who use the word 'ginormous' all the damn time.
-Negative, angry types
-Politicians/the criminally insane
-Drug dealers.
-People who refuse to give high fives.
-Vain, self-centered artists
-People who type 'LOL' constantly when texting.
-People who didn't laugh at the LOL joke.
-Drama queens
-Girls who always get dumped and can't figure out why.
-The dental-hygienically challenged
-Polygamists
-Tree hugging bleeding heart liberals.
-Women from third world countries.
-Anyone with that shit-eating fetish
-People who ever liked the band "Book of Love"
-Pig ****ers
-Free loaders
-Your dumb friend, age 47, who absolutely loves her cats.
-Anyone with a false limb.
-The insecure
-Misers
-Chicks who have three kids by three different men.
-Daddies girls.
-Egomaniacs
-Anyone with an IQ lower than 85.
-Infantile ****wits who blame everyone else for their problems
-Narcissists
-Bad kissers
-The fiscally irresponsible
-pretty much you!!

A sample of a email the other day.....
(random chick) why dont you like kids? (my reply) what do i look like Jerry Sandusky?

recent email .4/042014 ( i used simple sentence to contact her) "No, you seem totally obnoxious. I understand why you don't like kids cause you are one:)"
she has a good point, this profile is silly , but heres the deal i like to laugh and there are plenty of weirdos on here , my friend got the same deal said to him on match..... now i being a guy dont look for ass or any hook up . I use this as to break up the work day and amuse me... if you want to meet people i suggest talking with them in public , we all wait in lines at food stores etc . As for the kids comment Hell yas i am a big kid I love toys and in the process of buying more remote helicopters and planes. if you lost your youth you lost your life! love laugh and love and live!!!!

PILLOW FORT COMMENT
Yes, I know what you're saying, "Dude, that blanket fort sucks." That would not be the first time I've heard such short-sighted criticism. Its structural integrity is dubious at best and there isn't a whole lot of headroom. But c'mon, it's not like I'm a freakin' architect or anything. Besides, this little baby is just a prototype. I have vast resources of cushions for anchoring and blankets in order to maximize square footage. My living room is just waiting to be turned into a totally sweet labyrinth of love.

I am very open to suggestions in respect to design and construction, as I'd like this fort to be a shared vision. Much like the Taj Mahal, its intended that this little beauty will be inspired by a very special lady. Once our shelter is erected, we can move in and work on some of our higher order needs. Or we could just order a pizza and tell ghost stories. Please email me with a picture if you want to be invited to this living room party. It will be sweet.

PS: I'm allowed to have sleepovers!

First Date
Well I would first ask my mom if I could borrow the mini van , and since I have all these coupons for Red lobster I am thinking thats the place to go plus cousin peanut waits tables there, so we would get our scrimps and butter milk biscuits on!!!

I would say perhaps Baltimore's inner harbor but I am allergic to bullet shots.

Perhaps also a nice trip down to Annapolis to egg Governor OMalley's house (we should do this before egging a persons house is taxed).

Maybe a trip to the super max prison located in the heart of Baltimore , because due to current news reports that seems to be the party spot!!! The only cover charge is a 5 year sentence but once you get by the velvet rope you have your choice of women and bottle service! now thats the life! Eat that P diddy!