Odds are your inboxes are flooded with one-liners from one-note douches with one-track minds. Don't worry ladies. I grew up with two women and a gay brother. I know what you're going through...
Let's see. Passionate, intense alpha male seeks intriguing, potential partner in crime.
Physique: I'm 175 lbs of pure metabolism and stand tall at 5'10. 6'4 in platforms...
Funny: I won't fake a seziure in the supermarket, but I'm not against hiding the last roll of toilet paper in the kitchen cupboard if provoked.
Jock Itch: Played sports my whole life. During football season, either show up wearing a 49er's jersey or I'll call you after the game.
Education: Had honors classes in high school and still bouncing around in community college. Got pretty close to finishing medical school, though. I only need seven more years to graduate.
Music (1): From Abba to ZZ Top, it's all good, really. Basically, anything with a good beat, I'm shaking my ass to. Eddie Vedder makes me wet, Sarah Mclachlan brings me to tears, and Gavin Rossdale can munch my carpet. When I die, I'm coming back as Aretha Franklin.
Music (2): Been a drummer since I was sixteen, can jam on the guitar and tinker with a piano. No voice, though. Every time I sing, all the neighborhood cats in heat line up outside my balcony.
Activities: Between Runyon Canyon and the nearest poker table, I'm up (or down) for just about anything under the sun or moonlit sky. Love to write. David Sedaris is the bar.
I give elders the utmost respect. To make them feel good makes me feel better about feeling old. Children adore me because they can relate. Family is crucial. Friends shouldn't be maintenance.
Back scratches are my achilles heel. Welts I can handle. Try not to hit me in the face or nuts, please.
As far as picking at my vulnerable sore spots and stabbing at them mercilessly with eloquently cruel and unusually concise wording, bring it. I too, can banter with the best of them. If you can hang with miscellaneous movie quotes, your stock just went through the roof.
Touch is trivial. As our lips meet, you will be swept away in eternal bliss for fractions of time that seem infinite. To speak without words is to listen without judgement. Most people need to be heard. I prefer to be understood.