For the next remaining text of my profile, you are now required to read it all with the voice of Jeff Goldblum. This is not an option.
I'm a human, which is cool. I mean, recent scientific findings always seem to make that less and less special. So many links no longer missing! But hey, I'm a human who can type, and they couldn't. So I'm better. Oh, and I have a job. Double better. I'll bet none of those human ancestors could sit at a computer desk and file books while assisting students with writing papers, now could they? Pff, amateurs.
I like snark. It makes me happy. It weeds out those who aren't up to snuff when it comes to mind games. Yup, a dull job and a massive ego: I'm a catch.
I put food things in a pan and create meals. I have nothing snarky for that, it's just something I like to do and I'm good at.
Oh, and I used to be a music teacher, because I was a masochist apparently. So I'll totally judge the world by their singing ability and have since been rendered impossible to enjoy any live musical event unless it's flawless. It's soooooooooo awesome.