Well in spite of some promising starts I have found it doesn't take much to scare off the fish around here. Women say all the time that they want an "expressive" man who can "share his feelings," (but when they find him think he "shares/talks too much"); want a guy who "knows what he wants," (but then think he's too "eager"); want a guy who likes the "simple things" in life (but then he doesn't make enough money!); want a guy who works hard to make a living (but then complain he doesn't spend enough time with them!); with "maturity" (but when he has that maturity by virtue of life experiences, "is too old" or has "too much baggage"); and "loves kids" (but has too many!). I won't bare all my heart here, like I used to do posting my poetry, telling about my dreams for law school and mistakes in life, etc., etc., (yes, we all have them!) but I have found the hard way that people (or at least those of the fairer sex I have met on here), don't really want to know the truth of what really makes you tick, (and sure don't want to hear about ur failures in life!). Honestly, I think most people on here are wanting a fairy tale that doesn't exist and looking for the "perfect" instead of just good enough, (not realizing there is no such thing as "perfect," least not in this world). In fact, I would even go so far as to say, while many women on here claim they want more than just a "like to do anything and hang out" profile of the kind of guy they would be interested in meeting, if you have any depth of experience or DETAIL to what you are looking for you are dismissed as "too complicated." (Never mind how you have grown through your experiences and have learned the fact that ALL good relationships take work to succeed). And yes, I have been divorced (twice!) one ten year marriage and one 1 year Vegas mistake on the rebound, so if that sort of thing is an "automatic" bar and kids freak you out that bad then please just save us the time. That's just my experience, so far anyway. Frankly about ready to throw in the towel on the whole online thing (forgive me if I sound just a wee bit cynical at this point, not complaining, just stating facts, or at least my candid observations!) Of course, I'm open to being proved wrong if you think you are the one who can do it! ;)
I suppose anywhere where we can talk and "size each other up" as far as common goals, interests and chemistry would be appropriate. I am NOT in favor of dinner and a movie on the first date, that's much too committal for a first meeting and you can't talk and get to know one another in a movie, (at least not without being rude to others!)... But perhaps somewhere meet for smoothies or ice cream for a first "get acquainted" chat and, if things go well, a follow up outside at a park where we could do something active like play frisbee or take a walk by the water would be nice... Also, I must say I am not a big fan of the "email for weeks on end approach" to dating, (as I am more aural than visual, and believe there are things you can tell from just the sound of someone's voice that you can't from other ways of communicating). NOT a huge fan of extended texting either, (although I know it's all the rage nowadays, and can). Ideally, I would like to exchange a few emails, talk on the phone a few times and then meet somewhere for the aforementioned "get acquainted" chat to see if there's any chemistry, (you know, that undefineable "magic" that plays a more important role than we might often choose to admit!). And besides, times a wastin & we ain't gettin' any younger! (Wouldn't it be nice if we were? Saw a movie like that once lol). Most importantly, I am just looking for someone with similar values and goals who would enjoy just doing some things together and talking, (as I believe the best relationships start as friends and go from there). Also, someone who loves animals and music, (all kinds), and is passionate about making a difference in the world would be nice. So if that sounds like you write me and tell me about your hopes, beliefs, dreams, (and yes, even failures!). I believe we are meant to learn from our mistakes, (not ignore them!). Sound interesting? Give me a shout! J
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