Hey ladies :) I'm Collin
I was in the navy for 5 years, lots of good times
I'm in school to be a professional helicopter pilot
I like to ride dirt bikes, hike, and shoot guns
I go to the gym probably 5 times a week
I have a good sense of humor
this is funny and you will probly lol
DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:
In my 20's: 29
Adventurous: Slept with everyone.
Athletic: No breasts.
Average looking: Mooooooo.
Beautiful: Pathological liar.
Emotionally secure: On medication.
Free spirit: Junkie.
Friendship first: Reformed slapper.
New-Age: Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned: No BJs.
Outgoing: Loud and Embarrassing.
Voluptuous: Very Fat.
Large frame: Hugely Fat.
Wants soul mate: Stalker.
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!
10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = Let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.
11. I hate you = I want to have angry sex with you.
12. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay
Conversation Starters (i.e. what you'd like to do on a first date...)
Coffee or beer depending on the time of day