This is very long and breaks my rule. But it's not boring like all the other long profiles. I do not like beach walks--although I would jog, excessive travel or sleeping outside. "Day camping" is fine.
I can raise one eyebrow without the other; almost do a Russian split and dunk rye bread in B&B with one hand; I can't help being on time or being honest about what counts . . .
If you are my mate, I will be your champion. But I don't blow smoke so be prepared. I am straight forward--iconoclastic even. Please don't think you're being kind by lying. Just don't bludgeon me with honesty. It's very useful to clarify, create a solid ground and maybe solve a problem. Here's my criteria for speaking up: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? Two out three speaks.
I think if I could just find someone 6' to 6'3", who is a great kisser and who wants to kiss only me as often as possible, that would be a reasonable start. Yes, I have to be attracted to you. So you'll need a visible jawline. Good bone structure wouldn't hurt and if you were magnetic, charismatic and brilliant I could handle it.
If you consider yourself a "regular guy" who loves polyester, it's not gonna work. If you're fearlessly honest with yourself that would be refreshing; being a communicator who listens as well as he speaks, who asks questions and actually listens to the answer is more important to me than someone who can go from jeans to a tuxedo (can't we all?). Courage and humor are winning qualities as well. I never met an honest coward, or a wise one; wisdom is good. (Suddenly I feel like Andy Rooney, and I really didn't like him that much).
I like a laugher who makes me laugh too. It would be a turn-on if you actually like women (as if they were real people), without being a womanizer, and enjoy being "the man" and like the traditional roles when it comes to romance, courtship and love. (And sex too--it's included in there).
I don't want a neanderthal, but maybe someone who just can't help having those big shoulders. Energy, passion and being young at heart is good.
You have to be a fast walker too, or I'll leave you behind. Hopefully you take care of yourself without being a vegan, or a pain in the butt about it--like I am. (To be perfectly clear: I AM NOT A VEGAN!! I am an anti-vegan and I love gluten.)
Insight about yourself is good. I realized a man can't be honest when he doesn't know himself. You should have an inner life; enjoy your own company (if you don't enjoy it, why should I?) and respect my solitude. I wouldn't mind if you knew how to speak English: "etcetera" instead of "ekscetera"; and if you could advise me when I need to use "whom."
Employment would be a plus even if you had no known profession. And being with someone sensitive to someone other than himself would be a strange new experience--I wonder if I could adjust. I don't care if you can play a musical instrument, but I'd prefer if you weren't a musical instrument--you know that people constantly played without meaning to. . . all those hidden keys.
Just to round things out, the following is a plus: imagination is helpful for a long term relationship, like imagining I look as good as I did the day we met--but not to the point where you think you're the Pope or a table, or have trouble distinguishing between the two; living in the moment; being silly, a creative person . . . and that can take many forms, but not so creative that you can't hold a job; an original, independent thinker--someone who might read me Yeats, or something else so beautiful it makes me cry.
I have given up asking for someone who can dance--although it would be very difficult if you wouldn't learn. And for all of that, you will be rewarded.
I may have lots of baggage, but it's not heavy and I carry it myself. Also I never confuse my baggage with yours.
If we are compatible, you'll be so happy because I will cook you a meatloaf, and furthermore, I am a woman who has learned that certain problems can be solved by separate toothbrushes, or houses; that all things cannot be immediately solved by communication--retreating to separate corners for a Welbutrin may be necessary; and when all else fails, I know enough to get a pedicure.
BTW In order to update my profile, POF Nazis are forcing me to choose a word (one of their preselected words) to describe myself--you can ignore that word with impunity.
P.S. I also write: "Take Me Into the Waves" on Amazon.com
First meeting . . . we talk about the weather and speak only in cliches. If that doesn't bore us, we'll know there is something going on beneath the surface.
First Date: Bowling. I hate bowling, so if I have a good time, it must be you.
---|||---|||---If You Lost
------///\-----Okay, but why?
BTW, I have found that the most apparently ardent pursuer who readily gives his number for me to call, and who may even get upset if I don't call him right away, when given my number often fails to call. It is a phenomena and a great way to weed people out--just give them my number. (which I do if at all interested)
To all of you wonderful men, just a note: "retired" is not a profession or even a job; nor is "professional." Don't know about other women, but
it worries me if a man is uncomfortable disclosing what he does for a living.
I thought I would share with you some mysterious behavior I've encountered by the male species that I find alternately amusing and disturbing.
1. Recently a fellow (who resembled a woodland creature) emailed me a most antagonistic letter chastising me for liking tall men. Though his is not the first hit I've taken for my preference, it was one of the most vicious. He accused me of being self-centered, thinking I am so good-looking, which "you're not" and being a bad writer. I wondered as I read his email, if he wrote to every single woman whose picture he saw, or if he too had certain criteria and taste that dictated whether or not he contacted someone. I wondered whether he thought his preferences made him less self-centered, better looking (and a better writer) than he thought mine made me. I wrote him back for some reason. I was tempted to let him know that height was not the reason for my lack of interest in him. But instead I just explained that while I prefer TALL, it's an ideal not a rigid requirement, and there have been men of varying inches in my life. I wished him good luck.
It's interesting to me that these same men who consider me everything from superficial to a fascist because I stated my preference for height, don't have any objections to my preferences for intelligence, wisdom and honesty (which also rules them out). They have no problem with the fact that I like good bone structure and they give me no points for my silence regarding weight, age or hair.
I have read profile after profile by men (sometimes these same men) who want only thin women, red heads, TALL women, short women, and women 10 to 40 years younger. The only time I took issue with a preference was when a man who wrote me and later called, wanted to know my height, weight, dress size and measurements—and how I looked in a bikini.
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