I'm going to start off with the negatives about me first then the positives,
1. I have never really rung people's bells off in dealing with them, I've always felt like the underdog in life because there's never been anybody to agree with for the most part.
2. I try very hard to look at women from their perspective however because I tend to frame them from a potentially us perspective I usually scare them away. I move in quick (stupid hunter's instinct!).
3. I don't quit too easily which appears to turn off women, I've been persistent at getting what I want my entire life, I'm very independent and I treat my search for the right woman the same way.
4. Starting a life with a woman is my greatest desire so I think women intuitively feel that pressure from me and interpret that to mean i just want a destination to stick it in, however though I am very affectionate I am very aware that women have their own wants, I want my woman to share her wants with me and to have the same goals I have, which is to have wants that we could both participate in together such as going to Alaska or seeing ourselves young and beautiful, masculine, feminine etc.
5. I feel being alone my talents get undermined because i don't get any love from anyplace, and that's all of my bread and butter because I am driven from the heart so I have very little to offer before I ever get to speak to you which from the outside must appear needy, I don't see this as needy which is why I don't quit that, I feel this is important because I simply view myself as a team player and I am more interested in sharing then just getting attention or getting emotions out like most people, and finally I do best with positive motivation, in which case this is better??, lol, with another person.
6. I get attached quickly. I view myself as using my brain to imagine my life and because my plan is to focus on the details of what me "is" as a couple with a creative and thoughtful woman I feel that my life plan is on hold because I have nobody yet to start my life with the way I perceive living like a rock star is, together.
7. My physique has also undermined me and made me feel a little insecure since my voice sounds more youthful than I would like and I weigh 150 lbs at 5'9 therefore I need a woman who will view me developing into more and more of a man, I think that will help me grow because I believe in the power of the mind, the secret, law of attraction, God, Jesus, whatever you call that perception in your soul when you believe and perceive and activate qualities about a person and this life.
8. I jumble up words in casual conversation. I have never really felt comfortable in speaking to people because I wanted to focus on delivery and if I focus on delivery then I just speak from the mind and I never had anybody to practice with saying words right off the top of my head, the words sound so random when i think or speak off the top of my head. I grew up an only and played alone mostly. Talk was always about the news of the day the way I perceived communication. Only in the past two years have I finally picked up on some of the double meaning innuendoes of words and have found that this is the way people stand over somebody else in order to speak up, I am still playing with how I want to go about my conversation in building my personality, I haven't really chosen a style or seen a pattern yet that I agree with if that makes sense.
9. My brain has been penetrated by thoughts that aren't mine. Somehow my brains neurons have been receptive to input from someplace else causing me to feel constant bombardments and harrassments
like my eyes and head are being pulled out and tossed across the room to and fro. I don't know what kinds of remedies are out there. I'm scared and frustration however it's so bizarre even for myself being the spiritual person that I am that I just do my best to ignore the situation. I have had this issue for a year. I cope just by believing in myself and Jesus and by determination to choose for myself and succeed in getting what I want. When I feel motivated, focused or am with a person I like these symptoms lessen. What's wierd is that I wanted to have a relationship since I was 24 years old and now I have a real reason to find what I want, great, lol.
See the bad ass side of me below:
Ok, lucky 9's. lol. Now for the 18 wheeler side of me
1. I don't quit. There's just no point to make me want to quit.
2. I like sharing. I don't like selfish fishes!
3. I am healthy. I played football and wrestling in high school and rugby in college.
4. I have had some success at work in the past. Currently I haven't been working, however I am working on employment. I used to run 2 businesses working 2 hours a day making $50 a day in 2009.
5. I'd like to share my inner world with a woman using our brains and our hearts to think about each other and to walk as one toward our goals, law of attraction, Jesus, mind over matter, etc. and yes I have had some tangible evidence this works.
6. I have a master's degree. A business degree from USC and a Theology degree from Biola. My greatest strength is that I choose love first. I have always loved as motivation and believe in the golden rule.
7. I like conversation. I am very much a people person. All my experience working has been as a salesman.
8. I take my relationships seriously though I am very determined to play with that and find ways to view life and communication as a tool for laughter and motivation.
9. I believe in Jesus, heaven and hell and view my relationships with people as just a snippet of our eternal walk though I don't know about any past lives I may have had. I just have a sense that I am an eternal being, a spirit, and that others are spirits, which keeps me grounded in wanting to love other people
10. Because I definitely have more strengths than weaknesses I have a #10 spot, lol! I am available! The idea that a woman is only for sex is a turn off to me, I believe that oneness is right therefore I want to be with my woman all day and all night conversing!
I like walking and conversing. I'd like to get into role playing, I just want to make conversation nonstop, I would like if a girl and I could agree on the fact that what we say isn't as important sometimes as how we say what we're saying, I want to practice delivery and stupidity and talk, talk, talk! What I mean is I don't like arguing but I don't mind arguing either because I want to have a plan for everything. I don't mind if a girl talks trashy as long as I get to talk trashy too. I am an emotional person. I like characters and people who search for their own character type or personality. I like doing everything together as one. I'd like to be able to think about my woman during the day and want my woman to think about me, spurring each other on to obtain more and more success and whatever our hearts desire.