| About | Non-Smoker with Average body type | City | Sittingbourne Uk | |
| Details | 31 year old Man, 5' 9" (175 cm), Non-Religious | Ethnicity | Caucasian Aries with Brown hair |
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 The arty self-portrait |
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| I am Seeking a | Woman | For | Dating | |
| Needs Test | Not Completed | Chemistry | View his chemistry results | |
| Do you drink? | Socially | Do you want children? | Undecided/Open | |
| Marital Status | Single | Do you do drugs? | No | |
| Pets | No Pets | Eye Color | Blue | |
| Profession | Telecoms engineer | Do you have children? | No | |
| Education | Bachelors degree | Do you have a car? | Yes |
Relationship
Intent Stevehockey is looking for a relationship. |
Relationship History The longest relationship Stevehockey has been in was over 1 year long. |
About Me
As I lie in the bath gasping for breath, nose pressed against the bottom and trousers around ankles, I often wonder how many other people are maimed on a weekly basis by their bathroom fittings.
My toilet has always had a capricious air about it, what with its temperamental flush and affinity for blockage. These could at worst be described as acts of passive aggression; retribution for a bout of stomach flu or something. Of late, though, it has become openly hostile, throwing its occupant off like a bucking bronco. The join from seat to rim is cracked, and you really needed to be on the ball to avoid the in-off. You can’t just plonk yourself down, as it swivels violently to one side and hurls you off. You have to squat and balance on your toes, your a*** just feathering the seat, thigh muscles straining to keep you centred as you make constant tiny corrections, much like someone piloting a helicopter. Too much bias on one cheek and it's Black Hawk Down, off into the bath, hot and cold taps spearing you in the ribs.
All I've ever really wanted is a normal lavatory, something without a psychotic bent; and a flush that doesn't demand a Masonic handshake to operate. If you have similar problems, please get in touch, as I am thinking of starting a self-help group. Also please get in touch if you are a plumber.
My toilet has always had a capricious air about it, what with its temperamental flush and affinity for blockage. These could at worst be described as acts of passive aggression; retribution for a bout of stomach flu or something. Of late, though, it has become openly hostile, throwing its occupant off like a bucking bronco. The join from seat to rim is cracked, and you really needed to be on the ball to avoid the in-off. You can’t just plonk yourself down, as it swivels violently to one side and hurls you off. You have to squat and balance on your toes, your a*** just feathering the seat, thigh muscles straining to keep you centred as you make constant tiny corrections, much like someone piloting a helicopter. Too much bias on one cheek and it's Black Hawk Down, off into the bath, hot and cold taps spearing you in the ribs.
All I've ever really wanted is a normal lavatory, something without a psychotic bent; and a flush that doesn't demand a Masonic handshake to operate. If you have similar problems, please get in touch, as I am thinking of starting a self-help group. Also please get in touch if you are a plumber.
First Date
Sorry if you're looking for the sort of man who takes people white-water rafting on first dates; but the last time I tried that... well, she just wasn't a strong swimmer.
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