Born complainer - it has a certain ring to it, and it might just describe me. How's that for an opener? I think I treat everyone the way I'd like to be treated, but it rarely comes back to me. Should I just channel my inner jerk? I think I'd be a lot more satisfied if I did. Folks would finally be treating me the way I treat them. Yes, this is tongue in cheek, but it's based on facts, so I'll just keep going. Instead of providing you with the typical laundry list of my traits, likes, and aspirations, I'd rather make a case for blissful solitude, so that I wouldn't run the risk of being disappointed in people, or worse, disappointing them.
I started dating in the 70's, as soon as I could drive. I had such a bad experience on my first date, that it would be two years before I would try it again. That's saying something, since most folks that know me comment on how positive and upbeat I am. But five decades into dating women, I still can't get one "Thank you" from most dates. What is up with this? It's just common courtesy. I used to brush it off, but now it's just an easy screener for a second date, or rather the lack of one. Wouldn't you thank a friend if they planned a night on the town, picked you up, drove you around, dropped you off and sprung for the whole thing to boot? I think I've made my point.
I think being alone is growing on me. I'll probably end up being more anti-social as a result, but I'm already fairly social to begin with, so I can afford to be a bit more of a loner. Today I tried to help a woman who was stranded in Los Angeles, and in looking up places for her to go I was reminded of all manner of interactions I've never had with women, like beating them(!). Googling some places for her, I was appalled to see that there are many shelters with the words "battered" or "abused" in them, and it made me reflect on the fact that there are likely hundreds if not thousands of women who made or make poor choices in their significant others. How is it that I'm the nice guy and alone, while criminals are obviously enjoying some form of cohabitation with women? It's controversial to say, but a case could be made for this matter-of-fact naming scheme that abuse is something some women may unconsciously desire, or that it's at least a common enough factor within domestic relationships to justify facilities being built to deal with the problem. I just angered a lot of you, but prove me wrong. Aren't women always looking for the assertive guy who knows precisely what he wants? Taller and bigger men tend to be more attractive to women as well. Aren't these characteristics just a recipe for bad should you get on his wrong side? Women don't acknowledge that much.
Women complain as well, and I've gotten an earful over the 40-odd years I've dated, longer than most people, I'd wager. Many seem to be preoccupied with money, by and large, and always complain about cheapskate men. It's been drilled into me so much that I never let a woman pay for anything on a date. The downside is that several dates in, I still don't know if she'd be partner material in a fiscal sense. But at least she can't say I was cheap - that's the important thing, right? Yeah, I'm still alone, so I would never give a younger man advice to follow in my footsteps. Rather, I'm always amazed at my ne'er-do-well, marginally-employed associates who sponge off their girlfriends, crash at their places, borrow their cars, and yet can do no wrong in the eyes of their lovers.
Bored yet? I'll finish up soon. So this life hasn't gone so well in the family bliss department, even with what seem to be plenty of advantages given me. What have I learned in all this time from women? That respect, admiration and gratitude are granted very economically by them, even if you seem to deserve these things. That living right and treating others well is no guarantee that you will meet a woman of the same ilk. And that if you have a chance for a "do-over" by being reincarnated, you might consider being an abusive mooch who could care less about being appreciated. You just might do better with the fairer sex.