I am not here to impress you. I am here to scare you and make you run away.
If you read my profile, open your response to me with, "Hello Awesome!"
Something casual. Gymnastics, skating, origami, tea with the mad hatter.
Something that avoids the awkward silences that can be present when you
are first acclimating to a new person.
Since you've already met me and can now be re-assured I am not a psychopath,
maybe a trip to visit my awesome tire swing. Or a picnic in the woods.
Or, some other type of adventure. Maybe help me fix my fort by the railroad
tracks that has been recently inhabited by bums...
Maybe... Help me steal a recycling bin and put it in said bum fort and see
if those bums are considerate enough to NOT throw their beer cans all over
the place when the proper receptacle has been provided.
I take you out to dinner. Because after the second date you are worried
that I am a cheap-ass because I fed you picnic food.
Three, being the minimum needed to create a pattern, means that I have now
been labeled as that guy who "does too much for you and does not give you a
chance to reciprocate". Understanding this, I grant you the honor of cooking
for me. If said cooking ends up unpalatable by either party, Chinese food is on you.
I feel remorse for using you as a cooking slave. So I offer you a back massage at
no charge to relieve the stress of cooking for someone you barely know. Maybe
we make out. Maybe you fall asleep on me because I am just that good at making you
I convince you to get in a hot tub with me. I convince you that it is good for
alleviating stress on your spine. You know whats really going on in my head and
show up in a 1950's style 1-piece bathing suit instead of the 2-peice I expected.
I see that I've been foiled and ask if I am allowed to grope you as a consolation prize.
From that point on I expect either excellent chemistry or an awkward conversation about
the non-existant weather in the night sky.
Not dates below: Just you know, keeping notes.
Ever wonder why you can't get a halfway decent message from a guy on POF?
Well, that is because of POF's message filter. I am going to play a game now.
It is called: "Messages that were blocked by POF's message filter.
If you find a message where I misspell a word with a symbol, this may be the reason.
#1: 2014, Nov, 11th:
Susie, I'd sweep you off your feet. But the last time I did that to someone they fell pretty hard.
Lucky we were on grass. Unfortunately, it's not the falling that hurts. Nor is it the landing.
It's that initial impact to your shins when a sweeping kick collides with your unsuspecting legs.
#2: 2014.11.14, YYYY.MM.DD (Only accepts messages from upgraded users. Guess you missed out.)
You are going back to school for crimin