| About | Occasional Smoker with Athletic body type | City | Edmonton Alberta | |
| Details | 40 year old Man, 5' 8" (173 cm), Non-Religious | Ethnicity | Caucasian Scorpio with Brown hair |
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| I am Seeking a | Woman | For | Hang Out | |
| Needs Test | Not Completed | Chemistry | Not Completed | |
| Do you drink? | Socially | Do you want children? | Undecided/Open | |
| Marital Status | Single | Do you do drugs? | No | |
| Pets | No Pets | Eye Color | Other | |
| Profession | Yup, got one | Do you have children? | No | |
| Education | Graduate degree | Do you have a car? | N/A |
Relationship
Intent CautiouslyOptimistic1 isn't seeking a relationship or any kind of commitment. |
Relationship History The longest relationship CautiouslyOptimistic1 has been in was over 2 years long. |
Interests
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About Me
Where to start? I am a bundle of contradictions…
Okay, I stole that from a profile I saw that started that way, and I thought that made perfect sense as a way to describe oneself. Because we are all bundles of contradictions. To wit…
I love SF television and movies, good or bad, and will watch pretty much anything. But I when it comes to books (SF or not), they've got to be good, or I'm not interested.
I am shy in some ways, strikingly forward in others. Not the sort to pressure a woman, which can sometimes make me reticent to make the first move unless it's pretty obviously welcome. On the other hand, if I'm into you, I'm likely to say so rather directly. Sooner or later.
I don't understand the strict boundaries some--possibly most?--people draw between "friends" and "lovers." Seriously, that makes no sense to me. I'm not interested in having a lover with whom I can't also be friends. Even if it's a casual thing, I feel like I'd rather have at least a casual friendship to go along with that. (Aside: It's true, my intent is not to "seek" a relationship in the capital R sense. I'm not closed to that possibility, but if it were to happen, I would prefer that to be more an organic process than some sort of search for a perfect, preordained end-point.)
Privacy is very important to me. I don't see the need to share my private life (especially my love life) with all and sundry. However, with a lover, I have a tendency towards complete psychic exposure. Occasionally to the point of oversharing, but you can always tell me to shut up if I go too far. ;)
I am perhaps a wee bit overeducated, and as compensation for this, I make a point of admitting my own points of ignorance and/or uncertainty. I feel like this may be a necessary antidote to the know-it-all syndrome that overeducated people are often prone to.
I think too much. Except when I don't, and prefer not to think at all.
I am a lazy workaholic. I can work for 5-15 days straight, but am also capable of doing absolutely NOTHING for the next 5-15... though it's a rare occasion that I have the opportunity to do so.
I am thoroughly disorganized by nature, which is why I keep lists upon lists upon lists to try and keep myself organized. I never finish these lists. Nonetheless, many of my friends, acquaintances, and colleagues seem to think I am hyper-organized. Little do they know.
I am a perfectionist in practice, but I don't believe in perfectionism as a principle. (Working on curbing this tendency.) The point is not to reach the bar of external approval or "perfection," but to do what you love. (And somehow get by while doing it.) I will work my ass off to achieve my goals. But I'm not convinced that this is a healthy thing to do to extremes, even if one of those goals is to be "healthy." Imperfection is not just necessary, but inevitable.
I respond well to compassionate people who are willing to show their own vulnerability. Yet I am often most powerfully attracted to strong women with strong opinions.
People fascinate me. There's always more to them than meets the eye.
I believe in ethics, not morals. ("Morals" make me break out in hives.) Openness over exclusivity, honesty over politeness, and full disclosure in all things. I may not volunteer information, but if you ask, you will always get a straight and honest answer—even if that answer is that I'm not sure what the answer is. Yet. But I'll think about it and get back to you.
Anyway, that's probably more than enough. If you would like to see pictures, I've got some. Not too hard on the eyes, according to the general consensus. It's just that privacy thing. I suppose I'd prefer to have anonymous lurkers cruising my thoughts rather than looks. Once a conversation starts, that's another story entirely, and I'm happy to share—photos, thoughts, or whatever. If you want to know anything—anything at all—just ask. Once the conversation is engaged, I'm an open book.
Also, two links...
Link #1: I definitely like this cover better than the original, which may have to do with the gender of the performer? Sounds different coming from a woman than a man, somehow. Anyway, if it strikes a chord for you--especially the extreme candor of it--we'll likely get along:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UYEZnhnVCg
Also, this (an interesting article)...
http://jezebel.com/5339211/is-non+monogamy-a-feminist-relationship-choice?skyline=true&s=i
Okay, I stole that from a profile I saw that started that way, and I thought that made perfect sense as a way to describe oneself. Because we are all bundles of contradictions. To wit…
I love SF television and movies, good or bad, and will watch pretty much anything. But I when it comes to books (SF or not), they've got to be good, or I'm not interested.
I am shy in some ways, strikingly forward in others. Not the sort to pressure a woman, which can sometimes make me reticent to make the first move unless it's pretty obviously welcome. On the other hand, if I'm into you, I'm likely to say so rather directly. Sooner or later.
I don't understand the strict boundaries some--possibly most?--people draw between "friends" and "lovers." Seriously, that makes no sense to me. I'm not interested in having a lover with whom I can't also be friends. Even if it's a casual thing, I feel like I'd rather have at least a casual friendship to go along with that. (Aside: It's true, my intent is not to "seek" a relationship in the capital R sense. I'm not closed to that possibility, but if it were to happen, I would prefer that to be more an organic process than some sort of search for a perfect, preordained end-point.)
Privacy is very important to me. I don't see the need to share my private life (especially my love life) with all and sundry. However, with a lover, I have a tendency towards complete psychic exposure. Occasionally to the point of oversharing, but you can always tell me to shut up if I go too far. ;)
I am perhaps a wee bit overeducated, and as compensation for this, I make a point of admitting my own points of ignorance and/or uncertainty. I feel like this may be a necessary antidote to the know-it-all syndrome that overeducated people are often prone to.
I think too much. Except when I don't, and prefer not to think at all.
I am a lazy workaholic. I can work for 5-15 days straight, but am also capable of doing absolutely NOTHING for the next 5-15... though it's a rare occasion that I have the opportunity to do so.
I am thoroughly disorganized by nature, which is why I keep lists upon lists upon lists to try and keep myself organized. I never finish these lists. Nonetheless, many of my friends, acquaintances, and colleagues seem to think I am hyper-organized. Little do they know.
I am a perfectionist in practice, but I don't believe in perfectionism as a principle. (Working on curbing this tendency.) The point is not to reach the bar of external approval or "perfection," but to do what you love. (And somehow get by while doing it.) I will work my ass off to achieve my goals. But I'm not convinced that this is a healthy thing to do to extremes, even if one of those goals is to be "healthy." Imperfection is not just necessary, but inevitable.
I respond well to compassionate people who are willing to show their own vulnerability. Yet I am often most powerfully attracted to strong women with strong opinions.
People fascinate me. There's always more to them than meets the eye.
I believe in ethics, not morals. ("Morals" make me break out in hives.) Openness over exclusivity, honesty over politeness, and full disclosure in all things. I may not volunteer information, but if you ask, you will always get a straight and honest answer—even if that answer is that I'm not sure what the answer is. Yet. But I'll think about it and get back to you.
Anyway, that's probably more than enough. If you would like to see pictures, I've got some. Not too hard on the eyes, according to the general consensus. It's just that privacy thing. I suppose I'd prefer to have anonymous lurkers cruising my thoughts rather than looks. Once a conversation starts, that's another story entirely, and I'm happy to share—photos, thoughts, or whatever. If you want to know anything—anything at all—just ask. Once the conversation is engaged, I'm an open book.
Also, two links...
Link #1: I definitely like this cover better than the original, which may have to do with the gender of the performer? Sounds different coming from a woman than a man, somehow. Anyway, if it strikes a chord for you--especially the extreme candor of it--we'll likely get along:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UYEZnhnVCg
Also, this (an interesting article)...
http://jezebel.com/5339211/is-non+monogamy-a-feminist-relationship-choice?skyline=true&s=i
First Date
Seems to me there's a basic (and safe) formula for this...
The first time after previously online-only contact is super-low-pressure. Go for drinks or coffee, chat a bit, see how the transition from e-contact to personal contact goes. And if there are sparks in person, that's great. And if not, then that's fine too. From there, we can play it by ear as the mood and moment take us. Which might end up being fairly short... or not. ;)
The other kind of first encounter is the kind where you've already met, and you already know there's some kind of connection. In this case, anything goes, but I still kinda tend to prefer something that includes conversation. I'm particularly partial to the hang out and talk-and-talk-and-talk over drinks thing. Or drinks and pool and talk. Or dinner and talk. Or wander randomly around the city and talk. Or hang-gliding...and talk. (Not that I've ever been hang-gliding, but you see what I mean.) And if we find we've got nothing to talk about--well, then that says a little something about the interaction, now doesn't it?
The first time after previously online-only contact is super-low-pressure. Go for drinks or coffee, chat a bit, see how the transition from e-contact to personal contact goes. And if there are sparks in person, that's great. And if not, then that's fine too. From there, we can play it by ear as the mood and moment take us. Which might end up being fairly short... or not. ;)
The other kind of first encounter is the kind where you've already met, and you already know there's some kind of connection. In this case, anything goes, but I still kinda tend to prefer something that includes conversation. I'm particularly partial to the hang out and talk-and-talk-and-talk over drinks thing. Or drinks and pool and talk. Or dinner and talk. Or wander randomly around the city and talk. Or hang-gliding...and talk. (Not that I've ever been hang-gliding, but you see what I mean.) And if we find we've got nothing to talk about--well, then that says a little something about the interaction, now doesn't it?
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