Forums link: http://forums.plentyoffish.com/
Guys guys guys, you know I love ya (in my own "special" way),
but give me a break already. I am NOT interested in being your afternoon delight
(LOVED that scene in Starsky & Hutch though!), nor do I have any desire to play the role of
Mrs Robinson . I'm interested in meeting and spending time with someone I really like
and find irresistibly attractive; someone who feels the same way about me. Yes, I am very
much a passionate and sexual woman, BUT , why would I settle for mediocre when
I know I can experience nirvana with that one special guy; the one who can make me weak
in the knees with just a look. That's what I want, and I refuse to settle for anything less.
FYI: If you're a Catfish I will find out and I will report you. If you can't be who you really are you
shouldn't be here. Also, if you've lied about your age on your profile (spare me the "I accidentally entered
the wrong birth date and can't change it now" bullsh*t), that's an automatic elimination, regardless of your
lame-ass excuses for doing so.
Riddle me this boys: WHY do you guys add me to your favorites but never email me? I realize some use
favorites as a "bookmark" but there are those who address the favorites add in their profile saying they
intend to write but they never do...then there are those whom have added me that I would like to email
but their restrictions BLOCK me from doing so. That's the most frustrating...but don't you worry,
I'll get over it. :D
Oh and? If YOU won't date someone your own age, why the hell would I??
FYI : I am not a huge fan of lots of tatts and I don't like facial piercings. I consider the human body to be a beautiful canvas that needs not be messed with. Just my opinion, to each their own. Please don't send me hate mail, I could care less if you have lots of tatts and/or piercings, just letting you know that odds are I won't find you attractive. But I guarantee that someone will! (remember the invisible "next" button? If this sounds like you, use it NOW) One more thing : if your profile is wrtn n txt spk or your emails please pass me by. I love the English language and seeing it mutilated and barely recognizable out of sheer laziness (on a cell it's understandable due to character limits) is a HUGE turn-off for me and a strike against you. This holds especially true if you are in my age bracket, we were taught proper spelling and grammar and utilized it for the majority of our lives. One of the sexiest things in the world is a man who can write well and takes the time to do so. VERY attractive.
I would like to let those guys (you know who YOU are)-(seriously guys, stop it!! I am NEVER going to reply!!!) who email me repeatedly without having ever received a reply that my silence is confirmation that I am NOT interested. Please stop wasting your time! Email that pretty lady that pops up when you click "next" instead.
***Disclaimer: There is no "Next" button, it was used as illustration only. Please don't wander around looking for it!! If you think there should be one, email Big Fish. If you see one, go lie down immediately and wait until the drug(s) wear off to continue your search for everlasting love.
>((((º>`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸.·´¯`·...¸>((((º>¸. ·´¯`·.¸. , . .·´¯`·..> (((º>`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸.·´¯`·...¸>((((º>
I guess I'm going to attempt to dazzle you with my superior writing skills and convince you that I am the woman of your dreams, you just don't know it yet. Did I mention I am very humble as well? ;^)
Some of the fellows I have corresponded with here have mentioned that in my former profile I came across as being rather bitter and jaded. This gave me pause..what you need to know first and foremost is that I am very sarcastic, and by default I assume that everyone gets it and takes it with a grain of salt. Apparently this is a mistake on my part. So, do I reign in my natural tendencies, or do I write a lame, non-offensive generic profile like everyone else?
*ponders the thought*
Sorry guys, I am who I am, and I want someone who gets me, and not only understands my sarcasm, but can give as good as he gets. So, those of you who are easily confused or offended, leave now, cause we WON'T be a match. If I have to censor myself in order to have a conversation with you, then frankly, I don't really want to talk to you. But hey, thanks for stopping by!! :P
Random Facts (before it gets too boring):
I have two kids. Boy and girl.
I like men.
I AM independent, but relish being able to depend on someone.
I am a work in progress. You should be too
I'm a hockey Mom, and I absolutely love it. Helps that my boy is naturally gifted when it comes to sports, he makes his Mama proud. :)
I can be a tomboy, or a girly-girl. Depends on the task at hand, and my mood.
Not a fan of Jazz - it just sounds like disconnected noise to me. :S
I love kissing..in fact, if your kisses don't make my knees go weak, I probably won't kiss you again.
I will not waste a lot of time emailing back and forth, I am a busy woman, and I want to LIVE life, not talk about it.
I hate seafood..no really, I think it's gross. I won't eat anything that looks the same dead as it did while it was alive, and I don't do internals. *shudders*
I LOVE steak.
I LOVE cheese.
Strong dislike for excess body hair. I like smoooooth skin. ;^)
I am on the thin side and prefer a guy who's slim as well.
I don't drink, I don't do drugs, but I DO smoke. I will quit one day but it will be for ME, not you.
So I left for awhile...but I'm back now. I don't really expect to meet Mr Right here (or anywhere else for that matter) but I have made some great friends
so that alone is worth the price of admission. ;-)
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed assigned task.
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.