| About | Occasional Smoker with Average body type | City | Rushden Uk | |
| Details | 37 year old Man, 5' 10" (178 cm), Non-Religious | Ethnicity | Caucasian Aries with Brown hair |
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 Hard at work lol |
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| I am Seeking a | Woman | For | Long Term | |
| Needs Test | Not Completed | Chemistry | View his chemistry results | |
| Do you drink? | Socially | Do you want children? | Prefer Not To Say | |
| Marital Status | Separated | Do you do drugs? | No | |
| Profession | Chef / Manager / Security | Do you have children? | Yes | |
| Education | Some college | Do you have a car? | N/A |
Relationship
Intent Securitysam is looking for a relationship. |
Relationship History The longest relationship Securitysam has been in was over 6 years long. |
Interests
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About Me
Hi, Well i have not been on here for a while, thought i would try again, maybe this time i might have a little luck...
I am into Martial Arts and like reading or watching a good film, sometimes like to go for a walk in the country, would love to meet someone that i can talk to about anything, and everything, go and do things together like travel or sit in with a good film and bottle of wine, or maybe go for a drink with friends and have a night of being really silly just for the sake of being silly, lol.
I sometimes wonder if there is that special person out there, if so WHERE ?
Is it such a bad thing to want to spoil a woman and make her happy? I do sometimes wonder.
A little email i got a few months ago made me sit up and think, Maybe you could let me know what you think, here it is :-
WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE NICE GUYS ?
The answer is simple: you did.
See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were ****ing treated you.
At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.
Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the bar scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"
Well, once again, you did.
You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an ***hole than he ever wanted to be.
Fact is, now, he's probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.
So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:
1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.
I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.
I am into Martial Arts and like reading or watching a good film, sometimes like to go for a walk in the country, would love to meet someone that i can talk to about anything, and everything, go and do things together like travel or sit in with a good film and bottle of wine, or maybe go for a drink with friends and have a night of being really silly just for the sake of being silly, lol.
I sometimes wonder if there is that special person out there, if so WHERE ?
Is it such a bad thing to want to spoil a woman and make her happy? I do sometimes wonder.
A little email i got a few months ago made me sit up and think, Maybe you could let me know what you think, here it is :-
WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE NICE GUYS ?
The answer is simple: you did.
See, if you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a Platonic guy pal who always seemed to want to spend time with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy that you were ****ing treated you.
At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how he was a little puppy dog, always following you around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him. They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic, you vehemently denied having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position by claiming that you were "just friends." Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish boyfriend at the time pulled off with such ease.
Eventually, your Platonic buddy drifted away, as your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending time with this other guy was, admittedly, a little weird, if you werent dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend eventually cheated on you, or became boring, or you realized that the things that attracted you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good, long-term relationship. So, now, you're single again, and after having tried the bar scene for several months having only encountered players and douche bags, you wonder, "What happened to all the nice guys?"
Well, once again, you did.
You ignored the nice guy. You used him for emotional intimacy without reciprocating, in kind, with physical intimacy. You laughed at his consideration and resented his devotion. You valued the aloof boyfriend more than the attentive "just-a-" friend. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on with his life. He probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when you're upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the boyfriend that you had. He probably cleaned up his look, started making some money, and generally acted like more of an ***hole than he ever wanted to be.
Fact is, now, he's probably getting laid, and in a way, your ultimate rejection of him is to thank for that. And I'm sorry that it took the complete absence of "nice guys" in your life for you to realize that you missed them and wanted them. Most women will only have a handful of nice guys stumble into their lives, if that.
So, if you're looking for a nice guy, here's what you do:
1.) Build a time machine.
2.) Go back a few years and pull your head out of your ass.
3.) Take a look at what's right in front of you and grab ahold of it.
I suppose the other possibility is that you STILL don't really want a nice guy, but you feel the social pressure to at least appear to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. In which case, you might be in luck, because the nice guy you claim to want has, in reality, shed his nice guy mantle and is out there looking to unleash his cynicism and resentment onto someone just like you.
First Date
The first date ??? How about a trip up the river on my cannoo, i will bring the banjo and get some red necks to sit along the bank just incase we want to stop somewhere for lunch, am sure they could get a little piggy going??? "NO" ? well ok then maybe go for a coffee and lunch in a quiet pub or cafe so that we could chat and get to know each other???
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To send a message to Securitysam you MUST meet the following criteria: Female Age between 25 and 38. Live in United Kingdom Live within 75 miles. Must not do drugs |
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